Funny story:  Crowe wants lead role in 'Saddam the Movie'

Crowe wants lead role in 'Saddam the Movie'

Hollywood - (Ass Mess): Russell Crowe is said to be pitching for the title role of a new Quentin Tarantino epic provisionally entitled 'Saddam the Movie'.
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Funny story:  Bush dumped by his lawyer

Bush dumped by his lawyer

Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Harrier Miers, George W Bush's personal lawyer for 27 years and custodian of every secret nightmare ever erased by the US Justice Department about his criminal records, has thrown in the towel and dumped her number one...
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Funny story:  Local Man Found Responsible For Everyone's Emotions - Citizens More Than Happy To Point Finger

Local Man Found Responsible For Everyone's Emotions - Citizens More Than Happy To Point Finger

Seattle - A Seattle court made a pivotal judgment today that will relieve the citizens of Washington the burden of accountability for their own emotions and actions.
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Funny story:  US Triangle to have 4 sides?

US Triangle to have 4 sides?

A leading US Education spokesperson has sparked controversy after insisting his former school in Texas should be allowed to teach an alternative theory to standard trigonometry. In a speech to be delivered to congress early next week, Governor Randul...
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Funny story:  Chiquita Banana Inks Charmin Deal

Chiquita Banana Inks Charmin Deal

In a tiny cubicle in a Chattanooga rest room, Chiquita Banana announced today that she's the new spokesperson for Charmin toilet tissue.
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Funny story:  Tom Cruise's 2007 Resolution From Scientologist To Existentialist

Tom Cruise's 2007 Resolution From Scientologist To Existentialist

(Los Angeles--CA) Who was that little man coming out of a Starbucks on Wilshire Boulevard wearing a beret and shouting lines from Jean Paul Sartre's play "No Exit" mixed with profanity 2AM New Year's Day? According to TheSmokingGun.
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Funny story:  Studies Reveal - Women Who Tailgate Fulfilling Need To Cuddle

Studies Reveal - Women Who Tailgate Fulfilling Need To Cuddle

Washington - Doctors in Seattle have finished a five year study as to why tailgating was more common among women, and the results were announced Tuesday.
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Funny story:  U2 Member "The Edge" Changes Guitar Lick From "Plunka-plunka-plunka-plunka" To: "Plunka-plunka-STRUM-plunka"

U2 Member "The Edge" Changes Guitar Lick From "Plunka-plunka-plunka-plunka" To: "Plunka-plunka-STRUM-plunka"

Dublin - "The Edge," guitar player for the mega-hit band "U2" announced today that he had finally found a new guitar lick.
View 'U2 Member "The Edge" Changes Guitar Lick From "Plunka-plunka-plunka-plunka" To: "Plunka-plunka-STRUM-plunka"'
Funny story:  Department Of Education Bans The Words "Jihad" And "Pigs" From American Language -

Department Of Education Bans The Words "Jihad" And "Pigs" From American Language -

Salt Lake City, Ut - Officials here issued a statement that the words "Jihad" and "pigs" would no longer be allowed in the English language based on repeated complaints from a local father and his family.
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Funny story:  Bush's artificial insemination chief quits

Bush's artificial insemination chief quits

Washington DC - (Rioters): John Negroponte, Director of Artificial Insemination at the White House, has suddenly quit his post after less than two years after blaming the Pentagon's fuzzy systems protocols for civil war catastrophes in Iraq.
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Funny story:  President Bush Reads Protest Sign - Changes Mind About War

President Bush Reads Protest Sign - Changes Mind About War

Washington - President Bush announced today that he would no longer push for war with Iraq after reading a protest sign by an anti-war protester.
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Funny story:  Scat Fetish Attacks on the Increase

Scat Fetish Attacks on the Increase

In London, further incidents of Happy Scatting have been reported to the police today by both victims and witnesses of this disturbing new craze.
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Funny story:  Environmentally Friendly Celebrity Big Brother Launched

Environmentally Friendly Celebrity Big Brother Launched

London (UK) - Environmental groups have conveyed their gratitude and commendations to the producers of Big Brother UK for exemplifying the importance and benefits of recycling by launching the environmentally friendly 'Recyclable Celebrity Big Br...
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Funny story:  Wife's Fat Makes Pants Look Skinny

Wife's Fat Makes Pants Look Skinny

Omaha - One hour before attending a party, Sarah Gibson, 34, asked her husband Mark, 33, a scientist of Astronomy, if he thought the pants she was wearing made her look fat. "Now be honest," she said. "I really need to know if these pa...
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Funny story:  Rude Driver Feels Shame, Changes Ways After Being Honked At

Rude Driver Feels Shame, Changes Ways After Being Honked At

Kansas City - The power of the horn was made obvious today after Richard Dean, 23 of Kansas City, felt shame after being honked at by a man he had cut off.
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Funny story:  Student Creates Modern Icon By Mistake

Student Creates Modern Icon By Mistake

Art Student, Brian Ryan, was celebrating a stroke of good fortune today as his fridge has been selected as a possible entry into next year's prestigious Turner Prize.
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Funny story:  The Winner of Bob Dylan's Signed Guitar Is... You?

The Winner of Bob Dylan's Signed Guitar Is... You?

Slate.com hosted a contest where if one identifies all of the unreleased Dylan clips they win a prize. What Slate probably did not realize is that the majority of the clips could be found on YouTube, learning their lesson only after millions of e-mai...
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Funny story:  President Bush Opens Your Mail Without a Warrant

President Bush Opens Your Mail Without a Warrant

WASHINGTON, D.C.- President George W. Bush abused a postal reform bill in order to search people's mail without a warrant. Though Mr. Bush's actions are "contrary to existing law," the president says that he has the authority under...
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Funny story:  Palin's Atlantic Crossing Lands Him In Hot Water

Palin's Atlantic Crossing Lands Him In Hot Water

Monty Python funny man and round the world traveller, Michael Palin, is today in hot water over his crossing of the Atlantic single-handedly.
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Funny story:  Dead Sea Scrolls update: Parasites lived at Qumran

Dead Sea Scrolls update: Parasites lived at Qumran

Dead Sea - (Ass Mess): The recent discovery of a pre-hysteric latrine at the Dead Sea Scrolls site of Qumran has taken another twist this week as a team of French paleo-parasitology researchers slammed the ancient acetic Jewish sect of Essene residen...
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Funny story:  Tiny Lost African Tribe Found

Tiny Lost African Tribe Found

An undiscovered tribe of tiny people has been found in a previously uncharted province of the Western Coastal area of Africa.
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Funny story:  Brown Denies Sticker Sabotage

Brown Denies Sticker Sabotage

Gordon Brown has denied being responsible for placing a sticker on Tony Blair's back with the words "Tony tosser" on it.
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Funny story:  Blair Responds to Tosser Verdict

Blair Responds to Tosser Verdict

Tony Blair returned early from his break to make a formal response to the findings of the Tosser Report.
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Funny story:  Oprah criticized for assisting poor African children

Oprah criticized for assisting poor African children

Africa, Oprah Winfrey opened her new 40 million dollar learning complex today. She seemed very satisfied with the completion of the year long job.
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Funny story:  Banana Republic embarrases employees

Banana Republic embarrases employees

New York, Today,. Banana Republic instituted a new policy to create more dependable employees.
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Funny story:  Botham Slams The Slammers

Botham Slams The Slammers

Ian 'Beefy' Botham has slammed those headline writers that always say he slams things.
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Funny story:  Britney Spears' sex toy found at truck stop

Britney Spears' sex toy found at truck stop

A truck driver was suprised to see a bare foot Britney Spears exiting a restroom this afternoon at a Lousiana rest stop.
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Funny story:  Real Celebrity In Celebrity Big Brother Shock!

Real Celebrity In Celebrity Big Brother Shock!

Reports today that an actual celebrity has been lined up to go into the Celebrity Big Brother house on Friday.
View 'Real Celebrity In Celebrity Big Brother Shock!'
Funny story:  Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell secretly wed

Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell secretly wed

Rosie O'Donnell has been mysteriously absent from the View the last couple of days. The absence coincidentally coincides with a much publicized argument with Donald Trump.
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Funny story:  Home Depot Pays CEO $210 Million to Nap, Watch TV

Home Depot Pays CEO $210 Million to Nap, Watch TV

Home Depot's board has decided to pay chairman and CEO Robert L. Nardelli $210 million to stay at home and relax. The board determined that Mr. Nardelli could best serve the interests of shareholders by napping on the couch and watching TV. Th...
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Funny story:  Exxon Mislead? - "My foot!" Exclaims Exhausted Free Marketeer

Exxon Mislead? - "My foot!" Exclaims Exhausted Free Marketeer

In a Science Times article in the NY Times the shocking headline screams Exxon Accused of Trying to Mislead the Public.
View 'Exxon Mislead? - "My foot!" Exclaims Exhausted Free Marketeer'
Funny story:  Bush to force Democrats' Congress to balance budget

Bush to force Democrats' Congress to balance budget

Jan 4 Washington DC - In a dramatic u-turn, Bush has decided he does not want to bankrupt America after all. The years under his presidency saw the fastest rate of increase in the federal budget deficit the known universe had ever seen. What took fou...
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Funny story:  Chiquita Banana Caught on the Crapper

Chiquita Banana Caught on the Crapper

Chiquita Banana was the spokesperson for Dole Bananas from the 1960's through the 1980's. Her singing and dancing helped propel the company to millions in sales and made her a household name.
View 'Chiquita Banana Caught on the Crapper'
Funny story:  100 Monkeys on Typewriters Demand Personal Computers

100 Monkeys on Typewriters Demand Personal Computers

For almost a century (since 1915), one hundred chimpanzees have been pounding away on old style typewriters trying to recreate, at random, the works of William Shakespeare. Thus far, this has not happened.
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Funny story:  Lindsay Lohan, beaten by Scores whores

Lindsay Lohan, beaten by Scores whores

Lindsay Lohan was recently quoted as calling strippers tough whores when practicing pole dancing for her latest movie role. She'll be portraying a sexy exotic dancer when shooting begins.
View 'Lindsay Lohan, beaten by Scores whores'
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