Funny story:  Britney Spears To Record Duet With Idol's Sanjaya Malakar

Britney Spears To Record Duet With Idol's Sanjaya Malakar

Pop tart Britney Spears has invited American Idol castoff Sanjaya Malakar to her Hollywood recording studio to record an album. Sanjaya, most famous for his wierd hair styles, and Spears, most recently famous for her lack of hair, both have question...
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Funny story:  Egg in benefit fraud scandal

Egg in benefit fraud scandal

Representatives of the King's horses & his men today confirmed that an egg that they had reassembled in a pioneering piece of medical history, has been claiming incapacity benefits, despite being able bodied.
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Funny story:  Nigga Gots a Clue

Nigga Gots a Clue

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - New York - Today, Russell Simmons, prominent hip-hop music executive, showed he has a clue today when he urged that the industry eliminate the words "bitch," "ho" and "nigger" from use by the recor...
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Funny story:  Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty's parents 'awaiting trial in Mumbai for extortion'

Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty's parents 'awaiting trial in Mumbai for extortion'

Mumbai - (Rioters): Just last month on Commonwealth Day Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty was the toast of London, lecturing the Queen and invited guests at a Westmnsiter Abbey service on the theme of tolerance before being feted by Members of Parliame...
View 'Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty's parents 'awaiting trial in Mumbai for extortion''
Funny story:  I Am a George Bush American

I Am a George Bush American

I am a George W. Bush American...
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Funny story:  Yeltsin Alcohol Poisoning Mystery

Yeltsin Alcohol Poisoning Mystery

In a surprising statement today Russian news agency TASS claimed that former Soviet President Boris Yeltsin died from alcohol poisoning. They are investigating a top pathologists claims that the alcohol may have been administered over several years i...
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Funny story:  Introduction of new writer, Doug Burrell

Introduction of new writer, Doug Burrell

Here now, is my autobiography, as told by me, to me.
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Funny story:  St George's Day Wiccan victory over war graves pentacle ban

St George's Day Wiccan victory over war graves pentacle ban

Madison, Wisconsin - (Rioters): The Pentagon's dragon of ignorance and bigotry was finally slain on St George's Day as the US Department of Veteran Affairs caved in on a headstones pentacle ban that had outlawed the ancient Wiccan symbol fro...
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Funny story:  Kim Basinger Protests Alec Baldwin's Imus-Like Remarks to Daughter

Kim Basinger Protests Alec Baldwin's Imus-Like Remarks to Daughter

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Hollywood - Kim Basinger has died her hair red in protest of ex-husband Alec Baldwin's remarks to their daughter Ireland. "I can't believe he called her a nappy headed ho," exclaimed Basinger.
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Funny story:  Virgie Arthur planning invasion of the body snatchers if denied official visitation rights

Virgie Arthur planning invasion of the body snatchers if denied official visitation rights

Nassau, Bahamas - (Ass Mess): Anna Nicole Smith's mother is secretly planning to exhume and take home to Texas her dead daughter and grandson Daniel's remains from Nassau if she doesn't get her way in the courts with full custody of baby...
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Funny story:  Buzz Lightyear: Found Dead In Minnesota Motel Room

Buzz Lightyear: Found Dead In Minnesota Motel Room

The entire Disney community, as well as 5-11 year-olds everywhere, were saddened to learn of the passing of Buzz Lightyear, loveable character of the movie Toy Story, on Sunday afternoon. He was 46.
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Funny story:  CBS Radio/MCNBC admit being duped by Political Action Group in Imus firing

CBS Radio/MCNBC admit being duped by Political Action Group in Imus firing

NEW YORK - It was just confirmed that the PAC group, Media Matters, had in fact orchestrated the firing of Don Imus from CBS Radio & MSNBC. Media Matters is a 501(c) political action group, the same kind of group that went after John Kerry with thei...
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Funny story:  Three Satirists Declare Jihad Against Christian Spoofers

Three Satirists Declare Jihad Against Christian Spoofers

A new Holy War has been declared against Spoof writers with Christian beliefs. In a bold move, three leading Spoofers declared a Holy War against CalJennings. Another Christian satirist and fellow ex-patriot Texas, Jalapenoman, quickly jumped to hi...
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Funny story:  Death of  Boris Yeltsin Triggers Russian Economic Collapse

Death of Boris Yeltsin Triggers Russian Economic Collapse

The Russian Federation is in turmoil today after it was announced from the Kremlin that former president Boris Yeltsin has died at the age of 76.
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Funny story:  Expose: Congressional Sweat Shop

Expose: Congressional Sweat Shop

Here in the nation's capital, brightly lit rooms are hiding a dark secret. Hundreds of men and women are churning out thousands of bills, and hardly gaining any respect.
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Funny story:  Shilpa vs Big Brothers - Round 3

Shilpa vs Big Brothers - Round 3

Truckers' Stop, Ludhiana-Mumbai Highway, Apr 23 - When she was literally swept off her feet by the ever-graying Richard Gere at a rally against AIDS, 'Big Brother' show winner and semi-successful Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty today retu...
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Funny story:  Bush leads tributes pouring in for Yeltsin

Bush leads tributes pouring in for Yeltsin

Moscow - (Rioters): Tributes have began pouring in for former Russian President Boris Yeltsin who died earlier this morning after a lengthy career drinking for his country.
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Funny story:  Boris Yeltsin dies of alcohol deprivation

Boris Yeltsin dies of alcohol deprivation

Moscow - (Ass Messki): In a stunning St George's Day development the Kremlin has announced that former Russian President Boris and Olympic-standard vodka drinker Boris Yeltsin has died.
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Funny story:  Don Imus Gives Me Guilt About Paula Zahn.

Don Imus Gives Me Guilt About Paula Zahn.

(New York--NY) In the aftermath of the Virginia Tech shootings, the senseless loss of young lives cut tragically which may have been prevented if those leading lead better (Sounds a lot like Iraq.), Don Imus seems like a gnat. Not that what he said was inconsequential, but why is it so often it takes a large human crisis to make you reflect? Oddly enough, it was seeing Paula Zahn cover the Virgini...
View 'Don Imus Gives Me Guilt About Paula Zahn.'
Funny story:  McMahon To Run For President

McMahon To Run For President

Vince McMahon, chairman of World Wrestling Entertainment, today confirmed that he as entered the running to become the new president of the united states.
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Funny story:  General Jomo Gbomo Heads Interim Government in Nigeria.

General Jomo Gbomo Heads Interim Government in Nigeria.

ABUJA, Nigeria. (23-April-2007): A day of surprises and high drama in Abuja has seen the Nigerian naira reach its highest value against the US dollar, the UK pound Stirling, the Euro,...
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Funny story:  Camilla Pose Raises Eyebrows In Weird New Royal Family Portrait

Camilla Pose Raises Eyebrows In Weird New Royal Family Portrait

The wife of Prince Charles, Camilla Barker-Powles, appears semi-naked in the new Royal Family photograph by Sergei Pavlenko, which can be seen at the Royal Society of Portrait Painters exhibition from today.
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Funny story:  GMTV systematically defrauded viewers

GMTV systematically defrauded viewers

London - (Ass Mess): GMTV, the genetically-modified London broadcaster, has been accused of systematically ripping off viewers with a daily diatribe of relentless pap masquarading as bona fide news items.
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Funny story:  Schools blame wi-fi technology for teenage knifings pandemic

Schools blame wi-fi technology for teenage knifings pandemic

London - (Ass Mess): Compensation payments totalling literally billions of £££ could be payable if teachers are proved right that wireless technology emissions are cooking pupils' brains and turning them into violent knife-mad killers.
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Funny story:  Sheryl Crowe: Ken Livingstone's ultimate soul mate?

Sheryl Crowe: Ken Livingstone's ultimate soul mate?

London - (Ass Mess): London Mayor Ken Livingstone may have found his karmic twin at last amid reports that popular singer Sheryl Crowe has advised environmentalists that using one square of loo paper is sufficient for most people's hygiene needs.
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Funny story:  S.P.E.C.T.R.E. Says Gonzales Bad for Business

S.P.E.C.T.R.E. Says Gonzales Bad for Business

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Undisclosed Location - Ernst Stavro Blofeld remarked today that Alberto Gonzales was bad for S.P.E.C.T.R.E.'s business. The problem seems to lie with all the illegal aliens that Gonzales helped cross the border.
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Funny story:  Bush Spies on "The Spoof" Writers

Bush Spies on "The Spoof" Writers

CCN (Crazy Cal News), U.K. and U.S. - President George W. Bush came snooping around The Spoof after having the CIA locate all of The Spoof writers with their spy satellites. After hearing reports of the writers doing articles on him and his...
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Funny story:  Imus hires Garbage

Imus hires Garbage

Manhattan - (Ass Mess): Embattled former radio talk-show host Don Imus is fighting back over his recent CBS sacking by hiring high-powered Manhattan lawyer Martin Garbage.
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Funny story:  Man dressed as Priest hits woman after accusing her she is the Devil at  replacement bus stop.

Man dressed as Priest hits woman after accusing her she is the Devil at replacement bus stop.

Yesterday passers by found a woman lying on the ground with what they thought was blood.
View 'Man dressed as Priest hits woman after accusing her she is the Devil at  replacement bus stop.'
Funny story:  Bush Pays Eliot Spitzer to Introduce Gay Marraige Bill

Bush Pays Eliot Spitzer to Introduce Gay Marraige Bill

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - New York - Gov. Eliot Spitzer will introduce a bill in the coming weeks to legalize same-sex marriage in New York. Having been paid by President George W. Bush so that he and gay lover Prime Minister Tony Blair could have a pl...
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Funny story:  Fife Sends Dirty Protest to Edinburgh

Fife Sends Dirty Protest to Edinburgh

The ancient Kingdom of Fife is furious over the filth being washed up on its beaches after Edinburgh's flood of sewage poured into the River Forth. Now Fifers have declared a waste war on their Lothian neighbours, bombarding the city with litter,...
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Funny story:  Sheryl Crow Introduces the Crowostomy Bag

Sheryl Crow Introduces the Crowostomy Bag

Maynard MA - Former singer-songwriter Sheryl Crow unveiled her ambitious plan to fight the double scourges of global warming and individual responsibility at the annual Lovers of Fatback and Other Pork Products Earth Day Symposium.
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Funny story:  PETA to President's Rescue, NYSE crashes

PETA to President's Rescue, NYSE crashes

Washington DC, Apr 22. - The People for Ethical Treatment of Adolescents has come out strongly in favor of the beleaguered President of the United States. This is perhaps the first ever time the Leader of the Free World has garnered support from an N...
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Funny story:  Princess Diana, bigger than Beatles, Jesus, Earth etc!

Princess Diana, bigger than Beatles, Jesus, Earth etc!

LONDON (Ass' press) - Organisers fear the giant London concert for Live Earth may be totally overshadowed by the continued wailing, moaning and gnashing of teeth surrounding the Diana memorial concert organised by the Princes Wil...
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Funny story:  Blackpool "To be floated out to sea"

Blackpool "To be floated out to sea"

The government have announced that the popular northern seaside resort of Blackpool is to be chipped away from the coastline of West Lancashire and floated out to sea.
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Funny story:  Real reason for disappearance of Atlantis: Existential Angst!

Real reason for disappearance of Atlantis: Existential Angst!

The legend of Atlantis, the country that disappeared under the sea, may be more than just a myth.
View 'Real reason for disappearance of Atlantis: Existential Angst!'
Funny story:  Man Utd's Ronaldo Scoops Five PFA  Awards

Man Utd's Ronaldo Scoops Five PFA Awards

Crustiano Ronaldo, the Manchester United striker, cleaned up at the annual PFA awards, scooping five prizes, making him the first player in history to do so.
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Funny story:  Britney Tells Real Reason She Shaved Her Head

Britney Tells Real Reason She Shaved Her Head

CCN - Hollywood - Today, in an interview, Britney Spears explained the real reason she shaved her head. Said ,...
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Funny story:  Bob Dole to Appear in New Viagra Ad Campaign

Bob Dole to Appear in New Viagra Ad Campaign

Former Senator Bob Dole is set to appear in Viagra's new television ad campaign promoting their newest product, "Two-Bagger Viagra". Company spokeswoman, Mariann Caprino, says the the new drug helps men who are no longer physically att...
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Funny story:  Bush to Make Documentary on Global Warring

Bush to Make Documentary on Global Warring

Though Al Gore won the popular vote in 2000, his recent popularity has really gotten to the President, according to an inside source. Bush apparently feels slighted by his one-time rival's Academy Award and Nobel Peace Prize nomination.
View 'Bush to Make Documentary on Global Warring'
Funny story:  Father Won't Allow Son to Quit the Presidency

Father Won't Allow Son to Quit the Presidency

It is said that President Bush has told his father he wants to quit his job, but that the elder Bush would not allow him to.
View 'Father Won't Allow Son to Quit the Presidency'
Funny story:  Former President Clinton to be Named Ambassador of Love

Former President Clinton to be Named Ambassador of Love

Revere MA - (Rooters): Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton has said that if elected to the White House, she will name her husband the first ever Ambassador of Love. In part, his job would entail much globetrotting, carousing, and participation in flash mo...
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