Spoof news stories from Wednesday 18 January 2006
Santa Claus Annual Operation 'Basically Illegal'
It seems it could be a gloomy Christmas for many children at the close of the year, following a suggestion by the European Union that Saint Nicks' annual present giveaway may come under legal scrutiny.
Ruth Kelly Gives Axe Murderer Teaching Job
Education Minister Ruth Kelly is under pressure again after it was revealed that a convicted axe murderer, Reginald Pox was cleared to teach in a secondary school in spite of being on the Axe Murderer's Register.
Judge Judy to Saddam: 'You think those Cruise Missiles were Bad Hussein? Wait til I arrive!'
BAGHDAD - "Judge Rizg Amin is out, Judge Judy is IN and "boy is Saddam Hussein IN for a rough ride" reporters said after Judge Judy "Sheindlin" boarded a flight for Baghdad yesterday . "I'm in a mood right now"...
Legendary ‘Dickens' Family Focus of Hopeful Research
Grand Rapids, MI- Scientists, Anthropologist and Historians have all converged on the city of Grand Rapids, Michigan, to conduct research on the legendary ‘Dickens' family.
Editors to help save Entertainment industry
The American society of editors today announced its program to help music and movie stars.
Study Finds People Amazed by Stupid Studies
A recent governmental study shows that most American's are bewildered and dumbfounded by the number of useless, senseless, and brainless studies that are done each year by both the government and private sectors.
Fat Americans Lie about being Unattractive
A recent survey conducted by the market research firm, NPD Group claims America's attitudes toward overweight people are shifting from rejection toward acceptance, citing that over a 20-year period, the percentage of Americans who said they find...
Pentecostal Interprets Terrorist Threat
SACREMENTO -- Sallie Ploss isn't an FBI agent, or a linguistics expert, but her preternatural gift helped foil a terrorist plot last month to blow up California's State Petunia Garden near the state's capitol building. According to loca...
James Lovelock Says Earth Is Doomed, Leaves On Branson Starship to Colonize New Planet
NEW MEXICO (AP)--Renowned scientist James Lovelock and a small group of adventurers have left the planet Earth after Lovelock warned that the world has passed the point of no return for climate change and civilization is unlikely to survive.
'The Governator' has Sex-Change
Governor of California Arnold Scwharzenegger has decided to have sex-reassignment surgery, and intends to serve out his term as 'Miss Dolores Satinette'.