A dark shadow stalks modern British society as the new craze of teenage pregnancy becomes ever more popular. Teenage girls are no longer turning to the cheap thrill of alcopops, over the counter painkillers and heroin for their kicks but to a new mor...
BEIJING, China - One lucky diner enjoyed a special treat yesterday when he ate what scientists confirm was the last of China's rare white dolphin. In an effort to promote tourism and China's unique cuisine, officials raffled off the opportun...
JUAN DE BUTTOFUCCO, WA - Celebrity socialite Naked Paris Hilton opened ESPN's first season of live, televised seal clubbing today, taking a sea lion pup by the flipper and dragging it onto the dance floor of "Thunder Clap," the most &qu...
Burbank (CA) - The Attorneys representing Nicole Richie are suing Garmin, the manufacturers of the Global Positioning System (GPS) that had apparently malfunctioned in her black sport utility G-Class Mercedes on that fateful morning she was wrongfull...
Cincinnati - (Ass Mess): An unholy row has broken out as lawyers representing the Architect of the Universe filed papers in the US Supreme Court alleging plagiarism and copyright fraud by the Answers in Genesis organization's temple to mediocrity...
Former pop star and alleged kiddie botherer, Michael Jackson, stunned fans today when he announced that he was to join the British Nationalist Party.
Uri Geller's Penis left St Guy's hospital today, amid scenes of near hysteria not seen since the sixties when Beatlemania was at it's height.
In a suprise move today, West Ham's Icelandic chairman Eggert Magnusson today announced 90's singing sensation Bjork as their new footballing supremo.
Uri Geller's penis was well enough to take some soup and wave to fans from his hospital bed last night.
Home Secretary John Reid said today that it is "highly likely" that Armageddon will take place before the New Year.
Mike Tyson former heavyweight champ of the world has been knocking out clients left and right in his new occupation.
Sex addict Peter North, 24, from the upper Westside said today that he had to do the unthinkable. After going on a 48-hour binge, North said that he wasn't left with any choice.
THe Philadelphia 76er's have finally managed to unload long time problem child and one time M.V.P. Allen Iverson. In a surprise move announced today, the team said that they have traded the player to Vinnie's Tattoo Parlor on 5th and Junctio...
Celebrity and pseudo actress Nicole Richie, most famous for being the friend of Paris Hilton (and co-star of her former reality show) and daughter of singer Lionel Richie, was arrested for driving while intoxicated. Richie was taken to the local pol...
Outer Space - (Ass Mess): Planning inspectors from NASA's building regulations directorate have warned that a recent application to build a conservatory-style extension on the International Space Station is a cynical ploy to install a skunk facto...
Actress and Party Girl Lindsay Lohan celebrated her first week of sobriety at a Hollywood Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. Representatives of the Guinness Book of World Records and Ripley's Believe it or Not museums were both in attendance.