In surprising news today, American radio personality, Rush Limbaugh bought The Desert Bedouin chain of Indian-owned motels from the Patel family. The Desert Bedouin has been a fixture in American culture for the last 20 years, under...
BURBANK, Calif. - The California Highway Police are currently investigating why actress Nicole Richie was driving the wrong way on State Highway 134 under the apparent influence of drugs. The Simple Life star and 25-year-old daughter of pop...
ATLANTA - Tens of thousands are dead and millions soon will be as a pandemic spreads across America and around the world, say epidemiologists at the Centers for Disease Control. The long feared global viral pandemic has started -- but it is of a com...
London - (Ass Mess): Financial analysts in the City of London have expressed astonishment that despite the weakness of the dollar versus the pound sterling, a huge wall of American money has been wagered on UK spread betting sites offering favorable...
A Labour Party spokesman today confirmed that the Foreign Secretary, The RT Hon Margaret Beckett had been shot in the backside by a poacher when out for a Sunday stroll in the woods at her home constituency of Derby. Her condition is not thought to b...
Veteran wildlife presenter, David Attenborough, is tonight helping police with their inquiries after more raids were made in London and Bristol as part of "Operation Knobber"...
Guests at London's Plush Dorchester Hotel looked on in disbelief as a brawl developed last night between two of Britain's best loved entertainers.
(Los Angeles--CA) Forget Brtiney Spears' upskirt oops! According to a Lindsay Lohan blog, LohanFan, the "actress" will be issuing a line of "extensions for the hair that you don't see...at least not during the first half of the...
WASHINGTON, DC - Still smarting from last month's midterm rebuke, the Republican National Committee has introduced a new campaign it hopes will suppress voter turnout in the future. Entitled, "You're Busy, Why Bother?," the multili...
Top Gear presenter, Richard Hammond was battling for his life last night as a TV stunt went 'tits up'. Hammond was driving the new Lotus Rocketfanny when he lost control and crashed.
Chelsea coach Jose Mourinho today announced that they would no longer agree to allow referees at their matches. It follows the sensational rejection by the English FA this morning of Chelsea's offer to "buy" all premiership referees fo...
NEW YORK - The Pulitzer Prize for Public Service went for the first time this year not to journalists but to news subjects -- actor Lindsay Lohan, singer Britney Spears, and celebrity socialite Paris Hilton.
He promised us a spectacle and last night Professor Stephen Hawking was as good as his word. In a night of thrills and spills, the plucky paraplegic finally conquered man mountain Klitschko to become boxing champion of the world.
Michael Schumacher, who to some is the best Formula One driver ever to have lived, could in fact be no more than a dirty cheat.
A man from Newcastle has threatened to be the first contestant to walk away with the top £250,000 prize on Channel 4's hit TV show, Deal or no Deal.
Characters:
Will - Eric McCormack
Grace - Debra Messing
Jack - Sean Hayes
Karen - Megan Mullally
Lucus - (not cast) yo...
Hugh Hefner, the founder of the Playboy Empire has been appointed the 266th Pope in a dramatic turn of events. The Vatican were in a crisis meeting earlier this month following the 265th Pope, Benedict XVI recent diatribe on the Muslim community.
Santiago, Chile - (Ass Mess): Leading Global Piss Process luminaries, Bush Administration client-dictators and top-notch account holders of the Riggs Bank are preparing to fly to Santiago for the funeral of General Augusto Pinochet whose death yester...
In a distinctly un-seasonal move today the Government has announced that in future people on state benefits will have to be branded with an X on their forehead. A spokesman told us:...
In a shocking grab for power, the usually mild-mannered Smoothie King has led a bloody uprising against the Burger King.
Washington, DC- A spokesman for the USDA noted today that "We have been informed by our secret sources that our National Animal Identification System (NAIS) has missed a group that we should have been tracking previously. Evidently "Star-b...
NBC's popular series, To Catch a Predator, found the tooth fairy invading children's sleeping space on a recent production.
In stirring news today at the White House, your president, George Bush declared that he was a "vagina warrior" and will employ the implacable, Brittany Spears as poster child for the vagina movement. The term, "vagina warrior" com...