Spoof news stories from Sunday 11 September 2005
Original M.C. Hammer pants fetches $2 at Goodwill Store
Oakland CA -- A pair of extremely baggy pants that were worn by the rapper M.C. Hammer during the early 90's were bought by a Mrs. Julie Brooks at a Goodwill Store yesterday. The pants are part of a large collection of clothing that was donated b...
‘I thought I looked cool', admits Vanilla Ice
Speaking in a tell all interview, Vanilla Ice (real name Robert Van Winkle), admitted that he thought he looked cool during the height of his fame around 1990. "Yeah, I know I've said that I only wore those clothes because the record company told me...
Ebay to launch E-Looting
Inspired by reports of massive looting in New Orleans in the wake of hurricane Katrina Ebay, the world's largest online auction, launched E-Looting, an electronic shopping cart system that brings looters and buyers together.
Bush Appoints AFLAC Duck Assistant Director of F.E.M.A.
(AP) In a move that surprised just about anyone who thought that George Bush had any intelligence left (all six of them), the President appointed the AFLAC duck to be the Assistant Director of F.E.M.A. and new head of the New Orleans clean up. Bush...
Paris Hilton Wants to Experience Oregon Bulge
Bend OR -- Because the Hilton Hotel chain, with franchises is Paris, New York, and L.A. "practically demands" its franchisees stay on top of their competition, it has petitioned the US Geological Survey to construct an architecturally uni...
Michael Brown Arrested; FEMA Chief Charged with Animal Cruelty and Abuse.
WASHINGTON (AP) After being relieved of his duties during the botched response to Hurricane Katrina, FEMA Director Michael Brown vowed that: "I'm going to go home and walk my dog and hug my wife and, maybe get a good Mexican meal and a stiff...
President Bush Names Jim Belushi "Luckiest Man Alive"
In the room where Monica Lewinsky "visited" former President Clinton, President Bush officially named Jim Belushi "Luckiest Man Alive." Belushi, star of direct to the waste basket movies as "K-9:PI" and "Joe Somebod...
Hurricane Katrina To Be As Lucrative As Two Wars Says Dick Cheney
WASHINGTON (AP)-Vice President Dick Cheney has confirmed that repairing the devastation caused by Hurricane Katrina will be just as lucrative to Republican corporations as the U.S. wars in Iraq and Afghanistan have been.