Spoof news stories from Monday 8 August 2005
As Cindy Sheehan Waits, Media Begins Search For The Perfect Gold Star Mother.
Under the hot sun of an August day in Texas, the mother of slain Army Specialist Chris Sheehan waits. And waits. What's more, she's vowing that she'll continue to wait until United States President George W. Bush comes out of his Crawford ranch to me...
Reverend Claims that Wal-Mart is the Anti-Christ
(AP) Flea Holler, Arkansas - The Right Reverend Billy Joe Jim Bob Robinson declared yesterday that the Lord has revealed unto him that the nation's largest retailer, Wal-Mart, is the anti-Christ. The clergyman is head pastor of the Holy Praise Jesus...
New Weight Loss Plan: The M&M's Diet
Nutrition experts at candy company M&M Mars have released the newest weight lost method to hit the market: the M&M's diet. Selections from an interview with company spokesman, Skip Wiffleball, are listed below:...
Stelios launches EasyShuttle
Monday 8th August. Stelios Haji-Ioannou, Head of Easyjet and purveyor of all things cheap and nasty, has launched his latest venture - "EasyShuttle". As NASA's multi-trillion dollar waste of money Discovery prepares to avoid being...
Britney Spears Reveals Her Baby is a Clone of Republican Bill Frist
HOLLYWOOD (AP)--Pop princess Britney Spears and her husband Kevin Federline have revealed that their first baby will be a clone of leading Republican Senator Bill Frist.
New Men's Organization Calls for Limitation of Colors
A new group for men, calling itself "The Color Keepers," has announced a march and rally in Washington, D.C. for Monday, September 5, 2005. This date falls on the observance of Labor Day. When asked about the reasons for the rally and march, group...
Tom Cruise Still Battling---This Time With Lauren Bacall, Brooke Shields And Other Famous Babes
Africa, Europe (Cheltenham, Rome, etc.), U.S. (Athens, N.Y., Hollywood, etc.) and Mars Intergalactically---Fresh from his thrilling victory defending itsy bitsy teeny weeny Dakota Fanning from nasty blood curdling Martians, Tom Cruise battling fever...