Spoof news stories from Sunday 28 August 2005
Bush Planning To Barnstorm Washington
Prairie Chapel, Texas and The White House---With Barney and Miss Beazley, his Scottish Terriers, and Willie India, his black cat, having overrun the White House and the Democrats enacting their usual political mayhem, incumbent President George Bush...
Illegal Immigration Reaches New Heights
The Berlin Wall. The "Security Fence" in the West Bank. The US-Mexico border. Illegal immigrants have always found ways around, under, and now over these barriers. Saturday, David Smith Sr, a.k.a. "The Human Cannonball" fired...
Alan Greenspan and Jessica Simpson Burned in Effigy After Warning of House Price Crash
JACKSON HOLE, WYOMING (AP)-Wall Street shuddered on Friday after Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan laughed at American homebuyers since their investments are starting to crash down around their ears thanks to Greenspan's own inflationary, bubbl...
Bush Calls for Patience in Iraq
WASHINGTON (AP)-- On Saturday, President George Bush pleaded with Americans to be patient with the U.S. military mission in Iraq.
Mischa Barton: "I was a prostitute!"
California-- Mischa Barton, teen queen and star of the hit teen drama The O.C has shocked the nation, after revealing she prostituted herself when she was 13. "My childhood was rough. My parents were always working and leaving my s...
Filmmaker Moore runs for president
Flint, MI -- This afternoon filmmaker Michael Moore announced that he will run for president as a democrat. Three hours later the DNC announced that he will be the official democratic candidate for president against Bush. CNN, the communist news ne...
California "Dumbs Down" Jury Instructions
Sacramento -- New, simpler jury instructions are being implemented by the California Judicial Council. Expressions heard over and over in television courtroom dramas such as "Beyond a Reasonable Doubt" are being be dumbed down to "Pr...