Spoof news stories from Saturday 27 August 2005
FDA Puts off Contraceptive Decision, Agency in Trouble
Washington - The Food and Drug Administration put off it's controversial decision on the Plan B "Morning After" pill a little too long, according to Senate Majority Leader Tom Delay, and is now "An Agency in Trouble." With...
Americans United in Apathy, Indifferent to 'News'
WORLD PRESS-Latest local, national and worldwide poll figures indicate a disturbing trend that has network news and newspapers pointing fingers at each other. The reason: NOBODY KNOWS and NOBODY CARES!!...
Hurricane Katrina changes name to tRiNa
(PANAMA CITY) -- Noted hurricane communicator Geraldo Rivera caught up with Katrina off the coast of Florida. Rivera, the first human to discover that hurricanes were sentient life forms chastised the storm going,...
The Latest in Hands-Free Technology: A Sub-dermal PDA
Researchers at Cloud City Circuitry outside Portland, OR presented a new type of hands-free organizer yesterday at the Gizmos ‘N' Gadgets World Trade Show in Kyoto, Japan. In one unit, the size and thickness of a Wheat Thin, consumers can phone, e-m...
Cindy wants Bush Impeached
Washington, DC-- Sheehan begs House democrats today to impeach President Bush. She told congress that she holds Bush personally responsible for her son being killed in Iraq. Therefore she wants him impeached and tried for war crimes against humman...
UC Santa Cruz forth year Film Student from Culver city decide to join Surf City battle
Santa Cruz, Ca-- A Forth year film major in College 10 at UC Santa Cruz from Culver city spoke out today for santa cruz to be surf city usa. He feels that their city has the most veggie surfers in the nation. Since they hang out surfing all day e...
Poodle lands disabled 767 Jumbo Jet
(PARIS) -- Billed by Guinness as the world's smartest dog, Muffin the poodle successfully took control of a disabled United Airlines 767 and landed it safely at Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris. Flight controllers say,...
Iraqi Constitution Writers Accused of Plagiarism
Baghdad -- Drafting a constitution for a country torn between a future as a democracy or a theocracy is "Harder than people think" said Iraqi Constitutional Congress member Ihmad Atusa. "We didn't see anything wrong with using th...
Guns & Roses Reunited
Hollywood -- Admitting he just couldn't do it on his own, a tearful Axl Rose broke down today, and called on former GNR bandmates Slash (Saul Hudson) and Duff McKagen to help him complete his long awaited album, "Chinese Democracy."...