Spoof news stories from Tuesday 2 March 2004
Robin Cook sends last ‘Letter from Edinburgh"
In his 500 years of whingeing from north of the border Robin Cook has scarcely ever said anything of interest. His broadcasts have been ignored by generations of radio listeners, and the fact that he has never made it to television shows just how imp...
Bill Clinton cookbook published
A book has been released which contains many of former president Clinton's favorite recipes, it has been learned."The Clinton Presidential Center Cookb...
NASA Press Briefing: "We're All Screwed!"
In a stunning press conference held today, NASA had promised to make a "significant" announcement regarding findings from it's Spirit and Opportunity Mars landers, and for once, NASA did not disappoint. Details surrounding the announcement had been...
Fair Trade - Ten Glorious Years
It's Fair Trade fortnight - so let's all celebrate improved relations with the colonies and more money in those poor benighted natives' pockets!...
Monica Lewinsky offers herself to Democrats
In a gesture of generosity rare in today's political world, Monica Lewinsky, famed fellationist and lover of Cuban cigars, offered herself to the winner of the Democratic Presidential nomination.
Marlboro Man update
Marlboro Man is riding through grasslands empty and void. His hands are bloody his matches are wet. He is pissed. He had to kill and sell the calf he liked to kiss the most, ´cause the damn Krauts had raised the cigarette tax. $ 4.25 is what they now...
George Bush: not funny anymore.
In the early days of his term George Bush 2 was seen as a gift to all satirists the world over. He beat off stiff competition from such favourites as Ronald "thick as shit" Regan, George "Shrub" Bush 1 and Bill "Shag monster" Clinton to win the award...
Alice Cooper: My Flower Hell
Rock god and post ironic Icon, Alice Cooper shocked the world of rock yesterday with his admission to a live long struggle with gardening.
US Denies Aristede Kidnap Claim
Deposed Haitian President Jean-Bertrand Aristide has alleged that he was kidnapped and forced to leave his country against his will by United States forces. Unnamed White House Source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse, wearing a black ski mask and carrying...
Church's Monopoly on Christ expires, Theaters cash in on Christ
New York, New York- Simultaneously numerous movie theater complexes across the United States and the world played host to the Mel Gibson produced flick, the Passion of Christ. Tickets were sold out months in advance for the opening night Wednesday a...
Administration's New Report is the Same Old Story
The new United States proposal for Middle East reform addresses every conceivable problem facing the region today: poverty, social issues and political instability but with one somewhat glaring omission. It doesn't mention the Palestinian/Israeli con...
Local Money Laundering Ring Un-Ringed
Pennsylvania-A joint effort of Lancaster County law enforcement agencies was "tipped off" by an insider on the local money laundering ring, in exchange for immunity. "Lancaster County has experienced a rapid increase in crime, especially in teens,"...