Spoof news stories from Monday 5 April 2004
"Spirit", Mars exploration rover, eaten by Martians
"Spirit", one of the two NASA rovers that arrived on Mars in January, has been attacked and eaten by a Martian.
Britain cuts ties with Europe, floats off into Atlantic
Britain has cut all ties with Europe and is now floating off across the Atlantic in the direction of America.
President Bush Vows US Led Coalition Will Find "Weapons of Mass Distraction"
Washington, D.C. -- April 5, 2004...
Leno Admits He Came out of the Closet
Hollywood. Jay Leno has admitted that soon after he debuted as host of the Tonight show, he was so worried about negative critical and audience reaction -- and about being replaced -- that he hid in the closets of NBC executives so that he cou...
Fuzzy Science
April 6,2004
The Administration went on the offensive yet again today to defend itself against accusations that it has distorted scientific fin...
A Sharp Dressed Man
April 5,2004
Former British Ambassador to the United States, Christopher Meyer said that at a White House Dinner with his countries Prime Minis...
The Premature Peaks and Valleys of a Presidential Race
Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts vaulted into the presumptive Democratic nominee spot after winning huge on Super Tuesday, and since then has faced the toughest political challenge of his life: avoiding premature peaking in the polls.
ORTHODOX RABBI ADMITS TO PORK ADDICTION
NEWARK, NEW JERSEY - Rabbi Melvin Levine was arrested Saturday for DWPO (driving while porking out), after police observed him driving erratically down a crowded highway. A large open bag of pork rinds was found next to the driver's seat, which promo...
Kosovar Albanians Heap Laurels on Boy's Serbian Rescuers
Following the death by drowning of two Albanian children in the river Ibar, a large percentage of the Kosovar Albanian population has mobilized in a public show of grief we in the ostensibly multicultural west can learn from.
Osbournes to open rehab center
The Osbourne family plans to build and facilitate their own personal drug rehab center based on the continuous admittance of at least one member of their family at all times. Family patriarch Ozzy was unable to comment on the rehab center as he is c...