Jokes
Showing jokes submitted by Stefano M. Stefano.
Show all jokes.
Back Seat Driver
One night around 10 pm a police officer pulls over a car that was speeding, and approaches the car. Inside, a husband is swearing and cursing at his wife, but stops his abusive language when the cop...
The Prescription
A woman walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for a lethal dose of arsenic, which she intendeds to poison her cheating husband with. Horrified, the pharmacist rejects her request. I could lose...
Three Wishes, Three Guys
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and a manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. One of them rubs it and a Genie appears from inside it. The Genie says, Ill give each...
Bull
My wife and I went to the state fair and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST...
Priests On Vacation
Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on vacation. They were determined to make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy. As soon as the plane landed they headed for...
The Ravioli Joke
An old Italian man is on his death bed in his home when he begins to smell what could only be his wifes cooking. The aroma from the kitchen is irresistable, and even as his strength leaves him, the old...
The Gay Flight Attendant
A gay male flight attendant was cheerfully going about his duties in his usual flamboyant ways, doing his best to make everyone enjoy their flight. Can I get you anything else, sweetcheeks? he asks a male...
The Billionaire Texan
A Texas billionaire and his wife take a vacation to Paris, seeing all of the sights and enjoying tours of the famous city. They stopped off at a prominent art gallery, and spent over a million American dollars...
Sex Object
My wife is a sex object; Every time I ask her for sex she objects....
An Italian Grandma
Anthony and his wife, Maria, are planning to visit his grandmother, so he calls her for directions to her new apartment. She tells him how to drive there, and adds, You comma ina the fronta door of the apartmenta...
10 Miles A Day
A man goes to his doctor to complain about his lack of stamina in bed, when he makes love to his wife. Obviously, youre simply out of shape, the doctor ascertains. You need strenuous excercise to regain your youthful...
The Company Christmas Party
A husband and wife were attending her companys Christmas party, and the husband was being a pest, talking too much, embarrassing her, and complaining about the food. Suddenly, he caught sight of a lovely lady at a table...
Visions
A man staggers into a doctors office and says, Doctor, I keep having visions and dreams of Mickey Mouse, Donal Duck, and Goofy. They keep coming and Im having trouble walking because of it. The Doctor replies, I see....
The Secret To A Successful Marriage
Two friends are out at a bar, when Paul says, Jerry, you and Nancy have been mariied 20 years, and seem to get along fine after all this time. Whats your secret? Jerry thought about this for a couple seconds and replied,...
Electric Gadgets
A mans wife complained that he just kept buying her things she didnt want. Look at this kitchen! An electric can opener! An electric blender! An electric bread maker! There are too many gadgets and nowhere to sit! So the...
High School Reunion
A middle-aged man and his wife are attending his high school reunion when they notice a woman sitting alone at another table, swigging back a bottle of wine. Oh, no! moaned the man. I cant believe she showed up! Do you know...
Adam And Eve
God decides one day that its time for Adam and Eve to become intimate with one another, so he has Adam come to him in a clearing, while Eve waits for him in a forest. Adam, I want you to walk up to Eve and give her a kiss. Lord?...
A Respectable Hotel
A man enters a hotel in the hopes of getting enough rest for his business meeting the next day. I need peace and quiet. I demand the comfort of a warm bed and the class of a respectable hotel, the snooty man insists. I can...
The Guard Dog
Frustrated that his house is constantly being burglarized, a man visits a pet store to find a guard dog. The store owner proudly brings out a huge 175-pound German Sheperd named T-Rex. Hes a big dog, but he looks kinda tame, the...
The Drunk Joke
A husband and wife wake up to the sound of someone pounding on their front door at 3 am. The husband answers the door and standing at his doorstep is a drunk getting soaked by torrential ran. Heyyy! Can you (hic!) give me a push!?...
At The Bar
A little 50-year old Canadian man is minding his own business at a bar, drinking his beer when a big burly American walks past him, and hits him on the neck, sending him sprawling to the floor. The big bully looks down at the Canadian,...
The dog and the Butcher
A dog walks into a butcher shop with a wallet strapped to his neck, and approaches the displays. He waits for a man to finish his order, then the butcher leans over the shelf and asks, Whatll you have? The dog places his paw in front...
The Drunk
A husband and wife wake up to the sound of someone pounding on their front door at 3 am. The husband answers the door and standing on his doorstep is a drunk getting soaked by torrential ran. Heyyy! Can you (hic!) give me a push!? The...
The Kangaroo
The kangaroo at the local zoo was somehow managing to escape every day, so the zookeepers constructed a 10-foot tall fence around his enclosure to keep him in. The next day, the zookeepers found hed escaped again, so they built a 20-foot...
Send To A Friend
Send this site to a friend!