This is a true story. Some years ago a friend was touring the west of Ireland by car. Late one sunny morning, he spied a bar ahead, miles from the nearest village.
He parked and walked over to the barman who was wiping down the tables outside.
"What time do you open?" asked my friend.
The barman looked at his watch, "Weeel it's half past eleven and we open at twelve. You're welcome to take a seat" he said, waving his hand towards one of the tables.
My friend seated himself and pulled out a map to check his route, while the barman continued his cleaning.
He finished and walked towards the door, paused and asked "Would you like a drink while you're waiting?"