Attila

Submitted by IN SEINE
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Monday, 2 November 2009

It's not widely known, but the infamous 5th-century marauder Attila had a nephew (on his 143rd wife's side) named Magilla.

The boy was always pestering "Uncle Attie" to take him along on raids, and his aunt finally persuaded Attila to do so. Unfortunately, the results were disastrous. It seems the boy did fine at the raping and pillaging part when on the ground, but was constantly falling off his horse.

It was embarrassing. At his wife's urging, Attila kept giving the lad additional chances, but it got to the point that he was disrupting the other horsemen, and interfering with their productivity, or I suppose one should say destructivity.

So one day Attila took the boy aside and said "Listen, this just isn't working out. I like you, and I love your aunt, and I'll pay for this, but I can't take you along anymore."

"But why not?" asked the boy.

"Well, it's like this," said Attila ... "You can Hun, but you can't ride."

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