Three midgets approached a monastery; one with a smug look on his face hung back while the other two knocked on the door. When the Mother Superior answered, one asked, "Do you have any midget nuns?"
"No, we don't" Sniffed the Mother Superior, closing the door.
A minute later they knocked again. When the Mother Superior answered this time, the smug midget looked a bit sheepish. "Have you EVER had any midget nuns?" asked one.
"No!" Snapped the Mother Superior, slamming the door.
The two midgets turned to the other and said in a sing-song playground chant: "Lou-ie fucked-a pen-guin! Lou-ie fucked-a pen-guin!"