Janet's dog seemed to be having trouble hearing, so she took him to the vet.
"The problem," said the vet after examining the dog, "is that he has all this hair in his ears. What you need to do is go to the chemist and get some hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month".
Janet thanked the vet and went off to Boots where she got some Nair hair Remover.
As she was paying for it, the pharmacist said, "If you're going to use this under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days."
"I'm not using it under my arms," she said.
The pharmacist said: "If you're using it on your legs don't shave for a couple of days."
Janet replied: "I'm not using it on my legs either. I'm going to use it on my schnauzer."
"Oh, OK" says the pharmacist, "in that case, don't ride your bicycle for a week."