The 3 Paddys were in the Amazon rainforest on a missionary trip looking for a forgotten tribe.
Early in the morning, they were awakened by a crowd of black men wearing nothing but grass skirts and rings around their ankles, and taken away to a small camp of about 7 or 8 wooden huts.
Here, they were brought to the great cheiftan. He bellowed "There is only one way I will let you free...You will have to complete 2 tasks for me. Failure in these tasks will result in you all being whipped to death with rope made from the pubic hair of dead monkeys, laced with the teeth of a panther."
"the first task" he said, "is to find 100 items of a type of fruit. Such as a hundred oranges."
And so the 3 Paddys set out for 100 fruits.
After a while Paddy Scotsman returned with 100 grapes, and shortly after, Paddy Irishman emerged carrying 100 strawberries.
They waited for Paddy Englishman to come back, but the cheiftan got impatient and decided to tell them the 2nd task.
"While we are awaiting the return of the 3rd victim, you two must take all of your fruit and put it all in your arse at the one time. If you can complete this task you shall be set free."
So Paddy Scotsman was on number 97 when he ran into big trouble, he squeezed in number 98 and evtually stuffed the other 2 in and completed the task.
"Excellent" said the chieftan, "You may leave"
And so it was Paddy Irishman's turn. He got 95 into his arse, before bursting out laughing.
The cheiftan was shocked, "You were so close, Irishman, what is wrong?"
Paddy lifted his head and replied, "Aw, Paddy Englishman's coming back with coconuts..."