The (fictitious) Captain of the Q.E.2., although a brilliant organiser, was not reknowned for his seamanship. Still, when the ship was at sea, he had other officers to navigate and organise the seamanship for him.
It was only when entering and leaving harbour that the sole responsibility for the safety of the ship became his.
One day, while entering Southampton waters, a large liner started to cut across his bows. He ran from the bridge, down to his cabin, opened his safe and took out a piece of paper. He quickly read this, then dashed back to the bridge.
"Stop port...Full ahead Starboard...Hard to Port. Half astern port...Stop both...Full astern both engines. Stop both". Commands delivered in an authoritarian voice, and all in quick succession. A major disaster was averted, and all the officers on the bridge were really impressed. He became famous amongst naval officers the world over for his cool thinking and amazing seamanship.
A couple of years later he retired. The new Captain moved in. He had heard the rumour about the paper in the safe, but with not much hope, he opened the safe.
There it was! The piece of paper was still there!
With trepidation he read.
"Left, Port. Right, Starboard!"