The Gay Flight Attendant

Submitted by Stefano M. Stefano
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Saturday, 29 November 2008

A gay male flight attendant was cheerfully going about his duties in his usual flamboyant ways, doing his best to make everyone enjoy their flight.

"Can I get you anything else, sweetcheeks?" he asks a male passenger. "Coffee? Tea? Me with a key to your hotel room?"

The man blushes and tells him that he's fine, so the attendant moves on to a young woman.

"Darlin', I love your shoes! You simply must tell me where you bought such adorable pumps! Here, peachy-kins, have a soda on the house!"

He moves on to a married couple and squeals, "Oooooh! I looove that necklace, Madmoiselle! It is manifique! If you're not careful I might just snatch it and wear in the Gay Pride parade in San Francisco!"

The next passenger is a stern-looking woman from the Middle East, who isn't impressed by his effeminate ways.
"Hello, shmoopee-woopee, would you mind lifting your sweet trazee-wayzee up now that you're finished your lovely little snacky-poo?"

She frownws at him and says, "In my country you would not be allowed to speak to me that way. I am a Princess there and could order you to be imprisoned!"

The attendant looks down his nose at her, crosses his arms and replies,

"Well, sister, you're in my country now, and where I'm from I'm considered a Queen, so I outrank you! Tray up, bee-otch!"

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