Two Limericks

Submitted by Matt Birkenhauer
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Thursday, 7 August 2014

As an occasional versifier from Kentucky, I'm ashamed of the partial birth limerick that Senator Rand Paul delivered at Saturday's Fancy Farm Picnic. (To Sen. Paul's credit, however, you can tell he didn't plagiarize whatever that was . . . !)

To salvage the reputation of limerick writers all over Kentucky, I offer the following two paltry specimens:

There once was a pol named Rand Paul
Who was far from a George Bernard Shaw.
Still he rambled at Fancy Farm
Causing Ms. Grimes no harm
But proving that Paul could be dull.

A congressman named Mitch McConnell
Had vision increasingly tunnel.
And he sucked at the teat
Of the K-Street elite
Till the voters said, "Let's Ditch McConnell!"

I think both Senators Rand and McConnell are befitting subjects of the belittling inherent in the limerick form (which probably, much like McConnell himself, dates back to the 16th century, according to John Drury's Poetry Dictionary). I hope others follow suit. Be warned, however: It's tough to find a good rhyme for "McConnell," without cheating. I tried my best . . . .

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