Samantha Lewthwaite

Submitted by queen mudder
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Thursday, 26 September 2013

Twelve months after failing a Beeb Telly Tubbies audition the suspected Nairobi mall massacre terrorist got a call from talent scouts asking if she'd managed to slim down a bit

'Hello, is that Miss Samantha Jones?' the casting director asked, 'er, sorry...Lewthwaite?'

'Lewthwaite', the suspected terrorist replied, 'yeth, lath time I checked almotht theven kiloth!'

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