"Will you please stop doing that when the Avon lady comes over. She knows what you're doing and you can't blame all those fumes on the poor dog. You call him in here every time she comes over. Don't think she doesn't know it."
"I have stomach problems and she doesn't know as far as I can see!"
"That's from all the beer. This house smells like a whorehouse with all those smells you have her testing. You can't hide a beer fart."
"If she doesn't hear it (I use toilet paper stuffed up my butt as a muffler) and I blame any leftover smell from the perfumes on the dog, how can she tell?"
"I doubt very much that she fails to see you levitating over your chair over there!"
"Maybe she thinks I'm a Mystic?"
"Maybe I think you're a Mistake?"