We were really poor when I was growing up and so was the whole neighborhood. My family couldn't afford to get me a puppy because we'd never be able to feed it, so Dad gave me a cockroach.
I named him Killer!
Then one day a bully from school followed me down the street and I ran into my house but he was right behind me.
Expecting an atomic wedgie, I yelled "Get him Killer!"
All of a sudden this rottweiler ran out and bit the bully on the balls.
Since we were all so poor, the houses had looked all the same and I had ran into the wrong house.
The dog then bit me on the balls too but I walked with my legs together and that bully left me alone.