Moleturd came into the house all out of breath.
"What's the matter, Moley. Been playing checkers too fast?"
"Har de puff puff Har Har!"
"You're getting old faster than I am. Look at you. You look like you were born when the Dead Sea was only sick."
"Well, you're so old, your blood type has been discontinued."
"OK. Take your purple pill and come upstairs in about an hour. We'll see who's the oldest."
"You might win. But it'll be fun trying." (I'll take 2..hee hee)
Six hours later they're both in the Emergency Room.