A barman has pleaded with the cocktail bar manager about being sacked after arriving over three hours late for the evening shift.
'Sorry, boss,' Hungarian national Fabian Gabor said to his employer, 'but I had a terrible shock this evening watching the news about a young woman's body being found inside a holdall in the woods.'
'What's that got to do with it?' the boss demanded.
'Well, the police description said it was a blond woman with blue eyes, five foot five, possibly a Hungarian national - just like my girlfriend Zita.'
The manager clearly wasn't impressed and insisted the barman was fired.
'What a pathetic excuse,' he told the ex-employee, 'you must have known it couldn't possibly be Zita if the police report said 'holdall'... as opposed to 'massive steamer trunk'.'