Me and the wife booked a ferry over to Ireland. It was a fucking nightmare.
For most of the 24 hours on board, the majority of passengers were drinking free lager and fighting amongst themselves. Things were getting smashed up. Our cabin was disgusting and covered in sick. and all night we could hear this bloke beating his wife up through paper-thin walls. We were traumatised.
I went to complain.
"It says in the advert Stena Lines are supposed to be fucking luxurious!" I fumed at the Captain.
"They are, Sir," he replied. "Fucking luxurious. But this is Stella Lines."