Two Martians land in the middle of the night in a closed gas station. They get out of their space ship. The Martians go up to a gas pump. One says to the other ," I think these are Earth people".
"Take me to your leader!" replies the first Martian. No response.
The second Martian whispers to his partner, "I don't think we should screw with this one".
The first Martian says "Take me to your leader or we are going to blow you to kingdom come!"
With that, the first Martian takes out his laser gun and zaps the gas pump. It blows up and so does the gas station and the Martians are thrown into the air and land in a tree.
The second Martian says to the other, "I TOLD YOU, WE SHOULDN"T FUCK WITH A GUY, WHO COULD WRAP HIS DICK AROUND HIS NECK AND STICK IT IN HIS EAR!"
Meanwhile, Fergus McCarthy, not involved thus far in this joke appeared and stabbed both aliens in the eyes with a screwdriver.