Spinster Dies After Breast-Feeding Kidnapped Baby

Submitted by Hydrogen Balloon
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Tuesday, 31 July 2012

Miss Vicky Smegma was a very inhibited, sexually frustrated old maid. She knew absolutely nothing about 'the facts of life'.

One day she went to the grocery store and noticed a baby sitting by himself in a grocery cart.

"At last! Here's my chance to feel like a real woman for the first time in my life!" thought Miss Smegma. She grabbed the poor baby and ran out of the store and took the baby back to her lonely apartment.

The police found the baby a few hours later--unharmed and lying next to Miss Smegma's dead body. She had bled to death.

"It looks like she cut off both of her breasts and was trying to feed them to the baby." said a policeman. What a pathetic moron!"

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