10 Reasons Not To Jog:

Submitted by Inchcock
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Wednesday, 2 May 2012

1.
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now & we don't know where the heck she is.

2.
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

3.
I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

4.
I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

5.
I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up our body.

6.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

7.
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

8.
The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

9.
I can't light up when bouncing along.

10.
I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

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