10 Absolute Truths about your workplace - & everyone else's!

Submitted by Inchcock
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Wednesday, 18 April 2012

1)
The surest sign of a crisis is that when you have a major problem, no one tries to tell you how to do your job!

2)
The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form!

3)
The rosier the news, the higher-ranking the official who announces it!

4)
An expert is like a eunuch in a harem-someone who knows all about it but can't do anything about it!

5)
Any given company policy, rules, or procedure will outlast everybody's memory of why it was instituted!

6)
In a work-group, the unknowing will try to teach the lesser-skilled or-knowing!

7)
If you file it, you'll never need it. If you need it, you never file it!

8)
(A) When in doubt, mumble. (B) When in trouble, delegate. (C) When in charge, ponder!

9)
Anything you write to another person is sure to (a) end up in someone else's hands; (b) be misunderstood, and (c) be photocopied!

10)
The function of the expert is not to be more right than other people, but to be wrong for more sophisticated reasons!

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