Selection of Corny Jokes (25 to 36)

Submitted by Inchcock
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Sunday, 31 July 2011

25) Q: What did the lawyer name his daughter?
A: Sue.

26) Q: What's the best thing to light up a soccer game?
A: A soccer match!

27) Q: What did the mayonaise say when someone opened the refrigerator door.
A: Close the door I am dressing!

28) Q: What's black, white, and read all over?
A: A newspaper!

29) Q: What did the termite say when it entered the bar?
A: Is the bar-tender here?

30) Two blondes walked into a bar...you'd think at least one of them would have saw it.

31) Q: What would you call a Security Guard with half a brain?
A: Gifted!

32) Q: What did the man say when he walked into the bar?
A: Ouch!

33) "Knock knock" - "Who's there?" - "Ya" - "Ya who?" - Are you a cowboy?"

34) A girl comes to English class, 15 minutes late.

Teacher: "Where have you been? You're late for class"

Girl: "Throwing pebbles in the lake"

Teacher: "All right then, be seated. But don't let this happen again".

A second girl comes to English class, 20 minutes late (First girl sits down).

Teacher: "Why are you late? Class started twenty minutes ago"

Girl 2: "I'm sorry. I was just tossing pebbles into the lake. I won't do it again...promise." (Girl sits down)

A third girl comes in, 25 minutes late. She's drenched from head to toe, and shivering from the cold.

Teacher: "You're 25 minutes late! Why are you so late, young lady? And why are your clothes wet? What's your name? "

Girl 3: "My name is pebbles"

35) "Horror at the kitchen, where a ghastly crime scene took place. The victims suffered terrible injuries; two suffered severe wounds, and one died.

Three suspects fled the scene of the crime and are wanted for their heinous crimes; They are wanted for beating eggs, whipping cream, and killing time"

36) I couldn't remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

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