The Baby Ostrich

Submitted by Pariah
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Monday, 9 May 2011

A man walks into a bar, with a baby ostrich beside him and strolls on up to the counter. The bartender comes over and asks them what they'd like.

"I'll take a Heinekin and I'd like a bag of sunflower seeds for the ostrich," the man said.

"That will be $3.50", the bartender replied.

The man reached in his pocket and pulled out some money, without looking at it, and set it on the counter. The bartender counted it and found it to be exactly three dollars and fifty cents.

About thirty minutes later, the man got the bartender's attention again. "Excuse me, but do you serve food here besides the small bags of seeds and peanuts?" the man inquired.

The bartender advised the man that they have burgers, chicken strips and a few other odds and ends that can be ordered from the kitchen. The man orders a double cheeseburger, fries and a Guiness for himself and a salad for the ostrich. "That will be $11.65," the bartender announced.

Once again, the man reached in his pocket, and without looking, extracted the exact amount of money owed. The bartender was pretty amazed, but didn't say anything about it until a few drink orders later after having seen the man pull exact change time after time without ever counting the money. Finally, curiosity got the better of him. "Excuse me sir," the bartender inquired. "I can't help but notice you have an incredible knack for coming up with exact change every time you order. Might I ask how you are able to do it?"

"Sure," the man replied. "You see, I found a genie bottle a few weeks back and I made a wish. I've always been bad with money and really don't like carrying around a billfold and credit cards all the time. So, I wished that whenever I need money, whether a quarter for a gumball or thousands of dollars for a car, I can simply reach in my pocket and pull out just the right amount I need."

"Wow, that's incredible!" the bartender exclaimed. "But I'm still a bit curious...I mean, what's the deal with the baby ostrich?"

"Well..." the man replied. "My second wish was for a chick with long legs."

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