1) I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good, either.
2) I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
3) Tell me what you need and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
4) I don't have an attitude problem - You have a perception problem.
5) I don't suffer from stress. I'm just the carrier.
6) You lot are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
7) I try Never argue with the workers - They drag you down to their level.
8) Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
9) If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
10) Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.(Friend or Money!)
11) When you're right, I do not remember - When you're wrong, I do not forget!
12) I like work, it fascinates me, I can sit and look at you lot doing it for hours.