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From General Discussion / What Exactly Is A Poum?
Posted 13 Sep 09 11:59
Message

Quote: Morse


Quote: Jaggedone

This place is abundant with so much talent it's fucking amazing, poets, SFO's (Seen Flying Objects) and Spoof specialists! I am honoured to lick your Jackboots, but please leave your Luger in its holster, Auschwitz was burnt out years ago! Arbeit Macht Frei!



JO: Free Pass at the Pub, one night only....

Dueling Tarts at 6 Paces....and all you can drink...

Bring your sword pen and we'll cut up a few of the Swine!

Regards,

Morse


I'm wiz you all ze way, Achtung and a German Lager!

 
From General Discussion / What Exactly Is A Poum?
Posted 13 Sep 09 11:16
Message
This place is abundant with so much talent it's fucking amazing, poets, SFO's (Seen Flying Objects) and Spoof specialists! I am honoured to lick your Jackboots, but please leave your Luger in its holster, Auschwitz was burnt out years ago! Arbeit Macht Frei!

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 13 Sep 09 10:59
Message

Quote: Monkey Woods

That was a good one, JO!

Stains that appear in night - spunk.


nice to hear from my cryptical, Asian wondermonk!

spunk pleases us, normal Knights!

 
From General Discussion / Yank Bashing
Posted 11 Sep 09 18:58
Message

Quote: Morse

..thanks for the plug on my story, JO!

Another pint coming down the counter to ya!

Morse


No prob, Morse, how's the submarine, still yellow or are you looking for Sean Connery?

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 11 Sep 09 18:29
Message

Quote: The San Francisco Onion


Quote: Jaggedone

Self opinionated people tend to be tossers!





That's your opinion.


yes and it seems to smell of a certain of O-pi-NION!

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 11 Sep 09 18:26
Message
Isn't she a striker for Rangers?

Skoob.


Yeah and his alias is Jesus Buddha!

 
From General Discussion / Tosser Murray out in straight sets
Posted 11 Sep 09 18:09
Message

Quote: queen mudder

The twerp is out of the US Open with a fourth-round defeat by Marin Cilic, 7-5 6-2 6-2.

Always suspected he was a Henman.


So what's new?

 
From General Discussion / Yank Bashing
Posted 11 Sep 09 18:08
Message

Quote: smurfette


Quote: Skoob1999

I like that smurfette.

For me that was the most chilling moment in the movie.

5***** for being on the ball.

Regards

Skoob.


***********************************************************

one of my all-time favorites; i absolutely adored anthony perkins

i am a horror movie buff, particularly the classics and also those that combine comedy with terror, such as "shaun of the dead" and "idle hands"


Smurfette you're obviously a massive fan of Pinocchio!

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 11 Sep 09 18:06
Message

Quote: Monkey Woods


Quote: IainB

nervously everybody regarded various orifices under some sluts yahoo

Iain


Iain, this was 'nervoussy'. Oh well...

Orifices, rank in faeces, itchy cracks emitting shitsmells.


There is life after death after all!! About fucking time you mob!!!

shitsmells hideous if taken seriously, most excrement leaves laborious stains!

 
From General Discussion / Yank Bashing
Posted 10 Sep 09 15:01
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

Look, they've got me at it again.

The anger management classes aren't working.

I feel an overwhelming urge to kick the crap out of the tutor.

GRRRRRRRR!

Skoob.


Skoob I think you're being wound up by Jesus again, it's about time someone nailed that schizo to his cross!!

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 9 Sep 09 15:01
Message

Quote: The San Francisco Onion

If The Spoof counts as a publisher, I am an author.

Otherwise, I am a pensmith, which is not so bad, and I am not so bad at it.

As far as playing with myself, define "too much."


We know it! Self opinionated people tend to be tossers!

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 8 Sep 09 19:48
Message

Quote: Jaggedone


Quote: Monkey Woods

Sayings and yarblings in New Guinea suburbs.


suburbs usually burn under red bombshells stilletos!


STILLETOS, TITS, INSIDE LATEX LEATHER EXCITE THOSE OTHER SEXISTS!

 
From General Discussion / Limey Lashing!
Posted 8 Sep 09 17:55
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

Good idea that JO!

You could do a Spoof on that one, something along the lines of:

UNITED SIGN MICHAEL JORDAN - BUT IS HE ANY GOOD IN THE AIR?

Or something like that.

Regards

Skoob.


Brilliant Skoob, my first laugh of the evening, I've been Jauning it over yonder! Fuck me that guy never gives up!!

 
From General Discussion / Limey Lashing!
Posted 8 Sep 09 16:01
Message

Quote: Morse


Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Well, I like the Brits. I see no reason to bash them. I haven't a clue what 2 Betty Boo is.



I agree...some of the 'finest kind'....

Morse


Yes, I agree, and we know what real "Footy" is, Becham LA, whatever next, that's like Michael Jordan playing alongside Rooney, ACTUALLY?

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 8 Sep 09 15:55
Message

Quote: smurfette


Quote: Frankie The J

My dalliances?

You are my favorit JIT!


**********************************************************

if JIT is shorthand for idjit, i proclaim myself guilty as charged!




Talk about going off on tangents, Frankie did you get the curve or miss the exit?

 
From General Discussion / Any 1 here who wants to join my fan club?
Posted 8 Sep 09 15:51
Message
I refuse to take the name of Mon Dieu in vain that's blasphemy!! Meine Antwort ist immer noch NEIN!

CP fan my butt! that makes it a double NEIN!

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 7 Sep 09 19:36
Message

Quote: Earl Grey


Quote: Jaggedone


Quote: Earl Grey

Strange. He wouldn't go and invade Poland all over again just because of that story. Would he?.....


Mark is frightened of reverberations at his family home in Berchtesgarten!


And Eva probably wouldn't be too pleased either.

Now I know why he wears those shorts and slaps himself so much....


It's the Lederhosen and Britches that cause the twitches!

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 7 Sep 09 19:32
Message

Quote: Earl Grey

Strange. He wouldn't go and invade Poland all over again just because of that story. Would he?.....


Mark is frightened of reverberations at his family home in Berchtesgarten!

 
From News Discussion / Lowton Gets 200 Years for Speeding Ticket
Posted 7 Sep 09 19:02
Message

Quote: Philbert of Macadamia

5*****

If Mark was seeing all five women at once, would that make him a Pentamist?


Plenty of them in the Pentagon, BTW where is that fucking hijacked plane! That hole was like fitting a black dick into a virgin's pussy!

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 7 Sep 09 18:58
Message

Quote: BuckwheatsButt

I recently did a spoof story WAS ADOLF HITLER A GOOD JOKE TELLER?
The story was about Adolf Hitler, Heinrich Himmler, Herman Goering, and Josef Goebbels sitting around after hours in the Chancellory building getting snockered and telling jokes. The premise was, that the office dictaphone was accidently left 'on' and the impromptu party was recorded and the wax cylinder found 65 years later, translated and printed....Here's a take:

Hitler: Why don't those Jewish cannibals eat Germans?
Himmler: Got me mein Furher!
Hitler: Because we give then gas!

<Fists pound table-glasses rattle as foursome roars in laughter>

Goering: That was funnier than a screen door on an Italian U-boat!

<laughter>

Hitler: Stop it! Stop it! You're killing me

Goebbels: OK OK Did you know London refuses to publish pictures of Churchill with a cigar in his mouth?

Hitler: Why Herman?

Goebbels: Because of the explicit sexual images law!

<sound of body hitting floor and skidding chair-Howls of laughter>

Story wasn't published-Mark yanked it


Why? Hitler couldn't sue you or the Spoof, or?

 
From General Discussion / US Spoofers unite against UK aggression!
Posted 7 Sep 09 18:42
Message

Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Arnhem Bridge (Operation Market Garden) That was historic battle between the British 1st Airborne Division and the Germans. Did your Dad make it out? From what I've read there were some problems with the advance and unexpected German resistance during the battle. Brits were heros in that rukus against superior numbered forces. I think Montgomery took alot of blame for that one.


Yeah he made it and was a complete pratt Monty also!

My Grandad fought in the Dardanelles against the fucking shit bag Turks World War1

My Uncles were all pretty well involved:

One in the marines against Admiral Speer and the Graf Spee, another captured by the Japs in Burma he was a hero, paratrooper always first in and mostly get there balls shot off!!

Me I'm a fucking coward, run a mile!

 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 7 Sep 09 18:32
Message

Quote: Philbert of Macadamia

Aren't we all "Muck" Rakers of a sort?


YES!

 
From News Discussion / Lowton Gets 200 Years for Speeding Ticket
Posted 7 Sep 09 18:00
Message

Quote: victor nicholas

Lowton gets off easy again.


Definite 5* from me VC, love it! Is he a well know philanthropissed or a polygamist?


 
From General Discussion / Are you a writer or an author?
Posted 7 Sep 09 17:46
Message

Quote: victor nicholas

I always was amused by the thought of Hitler and his cronies letting their hair down at the Eagles' Nest.

Did they drink Pimm's and play croquet?


No VC they played the Aryan Brotherhoods version of monopoly called "Schnell to ze Gas chamber and don't stop at Go" also they enjoyed a bevvy called "Jewish Smokerise" over Belsen!

 
From General Discussion / Who Is Your Favourite Top 5 Writer?
Posted 7 Sep 09 16:54
Message
JO, I will gladly check it out. Hope you've not got me sharing with Skoob though. I hear he likes pickled eggs!

Medication time! Medication time!



Enough of this self publicity bullshit, Marks asks $5000 a sentence for advertising! As for pickled eggs, I just farted!

 
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