All times are GMT

Forum Home / Forum posts by Jaggedone


209 Pages - [1] 2 3 4 5 » »»
From General Discussion / Olympic ceremony?
Posted 17 Aug 16 18:20
Message
Dear Doc.B. Being a slightly overweight, dedicated, ageing cyclist myself 3 x times a week sitting on my Bulls Harrier, no pain in the groin either, I do actually understand what these athletes go Froo-me (X cuse the tour de France pun).

My saddles do not smell of virgin juices, in fact my wife complains about a strange odor exiting my saddle room that resembles cats urine. In an attempt to rid my habitat of the stench, we employ a frivolous, young, busty wench to bend over my saddles and take a gentle whack whilst applying an ancient substance called dubbin to my leatherette's! My wife does not approve of that either, so I just apply my helmet.

As you can see, perverse Olympics is not my thing, but busty wenches are always welcome!

 
From General Discussion / Olympic ceremony?
Posted 9 Aug 16 18:55
Message
I refuse to comment on Brazil 2016, it drives me to sniff a line or two.

I actually asked a Russian gymnast if I could sniff her line too, she accused me of being a pervert, after all having hairs on a female chest at the tender age of 12 is rather a turn off, so I agreed with her!

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Crisp (Chip) Flavour (Flavor)
Posted 20 Jul 16 07:03
Message
Ridiculous EQ, they only chew bamboo and hunt robbers!

 
From News Discussion / The wheelie-bin war
Posted 19 Jul 16 19:00
Message
Whilst Russian Dykes are pretty hot at shot-putting, Wales are even better sheep-shaggers! Looking forward to seeing how they do in Brazil! Could be a feisty contest as sheep-shaggers and butch shot-putters ram their balls!

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Crisp (Chip) Flavour (Flavor)
Posted 19 Jul 16 07:15
Message
Smith & Weston

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Crisp (Chip) Flavour (Flavor)
Posted 18 Jul 16 19:55
Message
I adore munching crisp eaters in the flicks whilst consuming a silent Charlie Chaplin, adds to the excitement and sound track..

 
From News Discussion / The wheelie-bin war
Posted 18 Jul 16 18:46
Message
EQ, that is sharper than my Walrus's back teeth!

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Crisp (Chip) Flavour (Flavor)
Posted 18 Jul 16 18:43
Message
I refrained from this dreadful habit many years ago and must admit the amount of Lays I have had since gladly increased; I believe most females prefer my peppermint smelling breath down below than cheese & onion!

 
From General Discussion / Why The Success Ratio Of Doomsday Prophecies Is So Low
Posted 18 Jul 16 18:39
Message
I prefer a stiff upper LBW personally

 
From General Discussion / Why The Success Ratio Of Doomsday Prophecies Is So Low
Posted 14 Jul 16 10:34
Message
EQ, maybe it's time to come out, then all will be revealed!

 
From General Discussion / Why The Success Ratio Of Doomsday Prophecies Is So Low
Posted 12 Jul 16 18:36
Message
I predict an Icelandic volcano will end the world as we know it and only gay, spouting geysers will survive!

 
From General Discussion / Selling Zeppelins Door to Door
Posted 20 Apr 16 07:12
Message
I purchased a LED TV once, do I qualify?

 
From News Discussion / Evidence Of First Transgender Toilet Found In Appalachia
Posted 18 Apr 16 07:50
Message
nice one, did they release internal, rear end combustion too? Or was their diet filled with plugs? Sorry Bugs..

 
From General Discussion / Rockhopper Penguins
Posted 10 Apr 16 10:51
Message
Batman knew the answer to that problem..

 
From News Discussion / Doc Corbyn "has built a time machine back to the 1970s"
Posted 10 Apr 16 10:49
Message
MW, I guess there are many of them over in Bangkok waiting to be outed?

 
From News Discussion / Doc Corbyn "has built a time machine back to the 1970s"
Posted 10 Apr 16 10:47
Message
EQ, as far as Bollywood goes, I once entered a Tabu for a drink and ended up singing Hari Krishna which Harrison plagiarised, then I wrote the Lord's Prayer before he left us.

 
From News Discussion / Doc Corbyn "has built a time machine back to the 1970s"
Posted 10 Apr 16 10:44
Message
sorry chaps, it's the Germanisation process continually uprooting my brains whilst residing between them and us, entschuldigung oder tut mir leid, you can choose...

 
From General Discussion / Exclusive Preview of My Novel
Posted 10 Apr 16 10:41
Message
EQ, grand effort, apart from a slight slip of the banana skin (well they have the same colour) spotted by Sir Sleuth Skoob, master of detection and the hidden gem.

I prefer mine hard boiled actually with a dob of mayonnaise to enhance the abortion, but that's purely a matter of taste.

As for potential publishers, here's a tip; I heard male Penguins guard the eggs through harsh Antarctic winters so their wives can go shopping in warmer climates, Skeggy I believe...

 
From News Discussion / Doc Corbyn "has built a time machine back to the 1970s"
Posted 31 Mar 16 07:14
Message
in the publishing world emphasising your points with bolds or caps is tabu!

 
From News Discussion / Doc Corbyn "has built a time machine back to the 1970s"
Posted 31 Mar 16 07:13
Message
be bold in the write sense of the word!

 
From General Discussion / Books That We've Recently Read
Posted 31 Mar 16 07:12
Message
to read is to follow to write is madness!

 
From News Discussion / Doc Corbyn "has built a time machine back to the 1970s"
Posted 28 Mar 16 11:49
Message
was good apart from the "Bolds" really not necessary! Shame!

 
From General Discussion / Trivets
Posted 28 Mar 16 11:47
Message
Trifle, yummy!

 
From General Discussion / Trivets
Posted 23 Mar 16 19:54
Message
I do believe one can get an LBW on certain brands of trivet, but then again it's only cricket. I tried a tricycle once and tripped, trifely annoying...LSD was better...

 
From General Discussion / Trivets
Posted 22 Mar 16 19:16
Message
MW, I agree this high brow intellectual comedy is rather strenuous on my retinas!

 
209 Pages - [1] 2 3 4 5 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

Go to top

Who is online?

There is 1 registered user currently online: none are active , 1 is currently inactive .

Users online:

Profile Featured Writer

snoz bunsen
snoz bunsen
Joined: 10 October 2004
Stories Written: 19
73 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more