Discussion Forum

Heir ist alles einen schmarn.
Er hat recht; es ist uberhaupt nicht mehr lustig.
Schlect genug einen weitern Kreig zu machen.
Aber, es lohnt es nicht.
Ich will Mr. Bean weider anschauen.
Er zu mindestens kann mir zu lachen bringen.
Auf weider horen.

You guys should write these up as spoofs rather than put them here where no one sees them.
I think they would work.

Dr. B,
My statements of healthcare were over a 25 year period of time. I think that is a decent average of hospitalization for anyone.
In Germany I paid approximately 25% of my wages for taxes out of which the healthcare was paid. I feel that is a fair amount. I pay only slightly less here in the States for no healthcare.
One time in a small emergency in Germany I simply went to the nearest clinic, swiped my healthcare card through their machine, they took me in the back, x-rayed me, pulled a broken pin out of my knee and sent me on my merry way all in about 20 minutes. In the US you would spend 20 minutes just filling out the paper work.
The insurances companies are paying out a lot of money and spewing a lot of negative chatter to defeat Obamacare. Those who support them are the same who claim to be great patriots but they are the worst traitors of all because they don't care who dies because of the lack of decent healthcare for the poorer of our nation.
And that includes the torn-up vets coming back from our great "patriotic" war.

It is nice to see a truly serious discussion here.
Having lived in Europe for years I have seen the problems with the socialist systems of healthcare.
But in America I have experienced the following:

Had a serious medical problem that required hospitalization and had to refuse to go to the hospital because I was living 60 miles out in a rural area and the ambulance alone would have been a couple thousand dollars.

This very winter I broke my ankle and fortunately had temporary insurance through my job that would have covered $1200 of it. I went to the doctor who charged me $300 (And it would have been more had I not refused the crutches and instead limped home using a ski pole.) and sent me to see a specialist. I went twice to the specialist, but he was charging me $318 each time. I was already up to $900! I called a chiropractor in far town, had her x-ray it for $40 and examined them myself and never went back to the doctor. I thought all was well and good, but now the insurance company is getting difficult about the paperwork and might refuse my claim.

I had kidney stones when I was younger and had to go to the poor peoples hospital to have them surgically removed. I was in the hospital for 11 days partly because the surgeon had accidentally sliced open the membrane around a lung and caused it to collapse. My bill was only $2000- a third of what it had been otherwise. If I had paid all I would have been wiped out. Even as it is I had to work the same day I went into the hospital and had to start a new job a couple days after getting out. I was emaciated, bent over and had to use a cane to walk.

In other words, health care in the U.S. can be a hell on earth. Notice that most of those to healthcare in the U.S. are either government workers who get their healthcare from the work of the taxpayers ( and then scream "Socialism") when Obama instituted the new system.) and those wealthy enough not to need worry about medical expenses.

Bozo.....

Unfortunately that is the nature of our world in the Kali Yuga- the Iron Age, the darkest age of man on this planet.

People will not have an understanding of the suffering of others until they experience it themselves.

And they will.

I snorged her.

End of thread

This thread is officially declared deceased.

D.O.A.

Stillborn.

Croaked.

Gestorben, dead, passed away, stifled, gone to the Happy Hunting Ground, wasted.

Alms for its burial and remembrance can be sent care of Rfreed, 476 Jerkass Lane, Aspen, Colorado.

Thanks.


Assholes...............

It's a bad joke, a very bad joke.
Of course Bush wouldn't have known the truth if it spit on him and the lie served Cheney's and Halliburton's purposes well.

OK, lets take this all back to where it all began and start all over again. This is the now famous quote that started it all for those of you joining in late. I will let it speak for itself and then chime in with my own cut(s).

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Quote: Skoob1999

I hate the lot of you.

You're all bastards.

Especially that pirate Captain.

And that wonky eyed nurse.

Bastards.

Skoob.

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Now for the new conitnuation- BARGIRL BUGGERERS!!! (and that includes the so-called Spoof "ladies'.)

I regret to inform you that Freudian psychology is slightly outdated. I prefer neo-psychological analysis. And also, no hot sauce is hot enough to cause you to have nightmare or such. And also, 'wet dreams' are usually not coupled with ACTUAL wet dreams. That's fricking primary education health classes (at least for me). Also, if you still have wet dreams (I am assuming you are above 17), you should really see a general practitioner. A guy above 17 should not be having such.

(for the less educated, let's say I insulted his mother)

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OK, you are forcing me to use the full extent of my intellect to insult you:

Smarty pants, smarty pants!
Just 'cause your underwear's full of ants!

This is my lust letter to the Snorg T-shirt girl.
The cute dark short haired one in the sqare ad who is looking off to the side, not the other jail bait ones.

This is for her eyes only. The rest of you buzz off.

My lovely Snorg Girl,
You're lovliness puts to shame the potty mouthed dribblings of the writers here.
Your countenance invokes the mystery and wonderment of the new moon at its fullest.
The wondrousness of your full bosom is a testament to the richness that womanhood can acheive.
With your love I would never need a pillow again.
Ah, for the touch of your fine hands upon mine
and the wondrous look from your eyes upon me.
But for a relationship all things seperating us would have to be gotten rid of
and that includes the t-shirt.
Let no material seperate our bodies natural inclination towards each other
even if it is your source of income.
For that matter get rid of the jeans too.
Lust is a many splendored thing.

We can either do this two ways, but I'll do it the first way.

Firstly, your dream would be totally incorrect. In order to imagine all the female spoof writers, you need to know what they look like. Assuming there are maybe, 600 writers, with half being women, thats 250. The human mind cannot remember 300 different bodies. It can just about cope with memorising 250 different people. So you suck. Also, the fact that your reproductive organ withered up means there is either something totally wrong in your mind, you have taken too much steroids, or, your penis has a serious, fatal malfunction.

You wanked (get it? It's very 'punny') yourself right into this one.

And for those, uhh... less-educated writers, who don't understand my carefully thought out explaination this is the second way:

You have a penis? HA! That's also in your dreams!

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Thank you Doctor Freud for your thoughtful analysis, which was truly an anal analysis (Get it? 'Anal' analysis- har, har, har!)
The causation of the disturbing not-wet dream was actually an anchovies pizza coupled with too much hot sauce and a side order of rather potent spiced nachos eaten the evening before.
I am going to see that your license to practice is taken away.

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Quote: Charpa93

Oh c'mon RFreed, fess up. It's not the first time you've been rendered impotent. Just the first time you're speechless.

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You're right Charpa. The other time I was rendered impotent was that time I had a dream of all the female spoof writers doing a line dance naked. The poor thingy of mine curled up, withered and almost fell off.

Yeah? Well... in a moroscracy - you'd be the ruler!

Ed: Also, in order for water to get into my brain, my head would need to split open, or treppaning used. I doubt any average person in a toilet would have the knowledge or tools nessesary to perform such an operation. The other choice {smashing open my head], would result in death, so unless heaven is pretty overhyped, I'm still here.

Plus, the water would just get absorbed nonetheless with little harm to my cognitive abilites, so there.

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I am stunned into silence. I've never had anyone answer an insult with a theoretical answer before. I cannot get my brain to spit out a sarcastic reply. I am left impotent with no reply.

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Quote: Inhopeless

Woo! Dorkfest... Dorkfes... oh. Hey! I aint no dork! You're the dork... dorkface!

Here goes (credit goes to the numbskull douchebag who mocked me 'cause I told my brother how to work out momentum... well, the momemtum of my fist + fear + him = Me suddenly running away)

"What a nerd! Oi! Nerd! What's the cosine of... your mum?! I sure hope it means I banged her!"

(for those who are not in the know, the cosine rule has nothing to do with sex. Unless your penis is a triange)

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It's beginning to sound like one of the women who you peeked on gave you a swirly in the toilet and some of the water got on your brain!

Hey, this thread is getting BORING...........

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Quote: Charpa93

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Quote: rfreed

He's the one who told me about it.
By the way, GET SNORGED!

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Ok, let's try and get back on track here. Skoob called everyone bastards and we should be responding in kind. Yet some of us have devolved this site into a dork-fest. Not naming any names, pipsqueak.

While I'm not familiar with your familial background, Freed, I still find it necessary to bring back the bastard remark and hope we can get back to the backstabbing and meanslinging in the manner to which it was first intended.

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But I'm sure you do very well at dork fests.
Or Snorg fests.

He's the one who told me about it.
By the way, GET SNORGED!

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Quote: cassandrova

Snorg girl = Alice Fraasa! :O

http://itsguycode.com/hollywood/254-who-is-the-snorgtees-girl.html

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Thanks for the info, but I think that's the wrong girl. There is another with her head turned to the right and a brunette.
She is cute though, but jail bait for me.

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Quote: Charpa93

Cheese it, pipsqueak. Monkey's onto us.

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Dearest Charpa the Mutt,
He's not really a monkey. He's that weird little creature in Jabba the Hutt's Palace who had hair hanging out of his ears and had that creepy laugh. I can see where someone would mistake him for a monkey.

Pipcreep.

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Quote: Monkey Woods

To be fair to pipsqueaks, everyone has a dark side in them, but it's a question of 'just how dark is your dark side'?

If you are someone who is normally only very slightly dark, then you can forget all about joining The Dark Side ©.. Indeed, only if you are the kind a person from whom light can't escape, should you bother asking Budda for the forms, because he doesn't like his time being wasted, and he will seek out and destroy anyone who isn't dark enough.

I hope that's made things a bit darker for you.

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I'm sort of mocha beige myself.

To Charpa the Hutt- it takes one to know one.

Freed,
I like you. That's why I'm gonna stop you before people start referring to you as the Snorg-monger. Say the word out loud, Freed, Snorg, snorg, snorg. Undoubtedly one of the uncoolest words to hit these forums in a long time.

Do yourself a favor and find a really good cool word to come at me with cause honestly, the snorg thing doesn't do anything but make me feel sorry for you.

Sorry.

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OK:
Bituminous,
bituminous,
bituminous.


SNORGICATOR!!!!

Hey, you stole my word "pipsqueak" pipsqueak.[/blockquote
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SILENCE WOMAN, OR FACE THE WRATH OF THE DARK SIDE OF THE FORCE!!!!!!

Have you ever noticed that there are no female Jedi or Sith Masters?
That is because they have all been carbonated and turned into nudie wall hangings in Jaba the Hutts fortress.

Think about that. Think long and deep about it.

You are seriously serious about this post Freed? It's about one of the lamest things I've read from you yet. Come on. I know you can do better than this. Keep it up and we're gonna have to award you "special" status.

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Have you ever considered going and getting a real, good Snorg?