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From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 19 Apr 10 12:24
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Egotism gives others time inspecting splendid me!

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 19 Apr 10 12:21
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...bladder after drinking....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Did Man Land on the Moon
Posted 19 Apr 10 12:18
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There are two van allen belts, an inner one and an outer one.

The inner one (situated between 300 and 1000 km up, depending on a variety of factors) is comprised of protons, or positively charged particles, commonly referred to as Alpha radiation. This can be stopped with a thin piece of card.

The outer belt situated at 10,000 to 40,000 km depending on a variety of factors (magnetic intensity, Earth's position to the sun, and solar wind intensity) is comprised of electrons, the negatively charged particles. At a height of solar intensity when the wind is strong, the earth's magnetic field is strong and our position in our orbit, these electrons can reach 10 Megaelectron volts, enough to disable an unprotected satellite or kill an unprotected human. This belt is quite narrow, a few kilometres across.

During the moon shots, very little was known about the belts, with them only having been discovered 15 years prior to the Apollo missions.

By sheer damned luck, the moon shots took place at a low in the cycle, otherwise, with the limited aluminium shielding protecting the capsule, Buzz Aldrin would be dead by now. However, the length of time of exposure, even at full energies, would mean that it took years for the effects to show. Aldrin has said that even if it had been a one way trip, he would still have gone.

Strangely, not one of the skeptics of the moon shots is willing to stump up the several million dollars required to prove that the moon landings were faked: pointing the Hubble at the Sea of Tranquility and looking. The module will be plainly visible next to the laser reflector that scientists have since used to determine with great precision the distance to the moon. NASA won't point the Hubble there to prove the landings happened because they know it would make no difference (see Chandryaan below), and only people who cherry pick the evidence believe otherwise.

The problem I have with conspiracy theories such as the moon landing one, is the sheer number of people who were involved. There were thousands of people involved in the six moon landings and one failure, plus nine missions there and back. ALL of them would have to be quiet about it. On top of this NASA would somehow have to fabricate the 382kilos of moon rock. Compare this with the 40kilos of moon rock that have fallen because of meteorite impact with the moon throwing up debris, and it becomes the simplest explanation that the 382 kilos were brought back by Apollo 11 to 17.

Finally, the Chandrayaan 1 spacecraft has taken pictures of the landing sites. However the Conspiracy theorists would have you believe that the Indians are now in cahoots with NASA in order to get the pictures of the lunar lander onto the Chandrayaan 1's pictures. If NASA took them there, and let them breath the tenuous lunar atmosphere until the saliva boiled off their tongue, they still wouldn't change their view point.

So...there's stuff left on the moon from six landings, a laser reflector precisely placed so we can fire a laser at the moon and see how far away it is, tons of video, still and sound recordings of being there, images from other space agencies, thousands of people who were there doing it, and a third of a tonne of moon rock. On the other side, we have a couple of pictures that don't make sense to people without a high school diploma in basic physics, and the fact that it was dangerous and expensive. Although the NASA would agree with the last two, but it didn't stop them.

Occam's razor would suggest that the simplest explanation is that twelve men have walked on the moon. To the conspiracy theorists, I say: Get a life. You're wrong, move on.

Iain

 
From News Discussion / Not the Large Hadron Collider
Posted 19 Apr 10 08:10
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Very VERY very (very) clever.

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 16 Apr 10 22:01
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Druids really upset Ike's dodgy stomach

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 16 Apr 10 21:58
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...the Microsoft offices in down town San Francisco, next to the....

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 16 Apr 10 13:08
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...washing dishes in a solution of...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 16 Apr 10 07:20
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Sickening individuals can kick eunuch's nuts, inciting nasty grunting

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 16 Apr 10 07:16
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...some girl from a Czech dating site wearing...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 15 Apr 10 18:09
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Snot, not overly tasty

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 15 Apr 10 11:38
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....Japanese tourists who use oversized cameras to take pictures of....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 15 Apr 10 08:45
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....towels of various colours that can be worn on the....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 15 Apr 10 08:44
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Yes...Everybody sneezes

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 14 Apr 10 07:59
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he bit the dogs tail instead of...


....joining the masonic lodge, where members are initated by....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 14 Apr 10 07:56
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Snorting Novocain ordinarily torpedoes individual's nasal gaps

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 13 Apr 10 16:30
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Rashers are streaky ham, eaten really slow

(could have said slowLY but neatly sidestepped the Y)

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 13 Apr 10 16:28
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....policies in place dictating that....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Just wanna say hi
Posted 13 Apr 10 14:51
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Have a bad memory of Liverpool...my mum decided I'd be easier to see if I wore a blue top in Anfield.

It took months for my spine to straighten.

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 13 Apr 10 12:10
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Knob: nineteen ounces, butter

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 13 Apr 10 12:09
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Bollock, one, lonely, left of centred knob

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 13 Apr 10 12:07
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...wearing women's underwear under his....


Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 12 Apr 10 12:49
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...duplicating the ideas, made up by....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 12 Apr 10 12:48
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Saccharific: a completely constructed homonym a rather incredible fabrication I conclude

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 12 Apr 10 07:52
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grocery resellers offer carrots, English radish, yams

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 9 Apr 10 16:18
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...eating jelly inside tubs made from...

Iain

 
54 Pages - «« « 35 36 [37] 38 39 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

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