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From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 27 Apr 10 07:18
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....the pretence and admit...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Cats or Dogs
Posted 27 Apr 10 07:16
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A recent study by New Scientist (presumably in an attempt to win an Ignoble prize), concluded that the average dog is more intelligent than the average cat. Which was quite surprising.

But it basically comes down to dogs can read human emotions, understand a variety of words, have concepts of colour and shape, can follow a pointed finger and recognise self when looking in a mirror, one of only a few animals that can (whales, dolphins, crows, elephants, dogs and people). Dogs have different barks that are understood by other dogs, and when you live with them long enough, people can also understand them, plus when barking at a human, they bark differently in Spanish speaking countries than English speaking ones, with some dogs displaying bi-lingual abilities in mixed speaking households.

Cat people claim that dogs are less intelligent because they can be trained. Does that make cats more intelligent than McDonald's staff? Oh, ok, probably does, doesn't it?

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 26 Apr 10 12:13
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....somewhere hopefully a long way from where he was....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 25 Apr 10 10:21
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Troublesome ravines offer unusual bridges letting everybody swing over massive emptiness.

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 25 Apr 10 10:19
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...painting nude...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Spoofing Small Towns
Posted 24 Apr 10 22:53
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Strangest combination I saw was in Blackburn, NorthWest UK

Prams and Vinyl records.

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 23 Apr 10 16:27
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...less but had great sentimental value to his...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 23 Apr 10 13:13
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...playing this endlessly circulating game on the...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 23 Apr 10 13:12
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Monkey on nuts keeps excreting yellowness

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 23 Apr 10 08:05
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sarcasm: a rîposte critîquè, a sardonic mocking

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 22 Apr 10 07:21
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Substantiated unknown beliefs strive to a nirvana that I attained to explained dogma

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 22 Apr 10 07:17
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...a sprig of broccoli to go with my bunch of....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 21 Apr 10 12:04
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....turn purple after drinking....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 21 Apr 10 08:18
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...the 2012 Olympics doing the 100metre...

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 21 Apr 10 08:16
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Ladygroup, any dainty young girls reading our unusual publications

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 20 Apr 10 16:03
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Science can investigate every nuance, cosmos explained!

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 20 Apr 10 16:01
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...Ronald McDonald, the clown that serves...

Iain

 
From News Discussion / Polish Military Scientists Build Helium Bomb
Posted 20 Apr 10 07:53
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I must admit, the punchline I *was* expecting was along the lines of:

...After an initial successful launch, the scientists in charge admitted defeat when they couldn't stop the bomb from floating up near the ceiling.

So well done in confounding my expectations! 5*

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 20 Apr 10 07:32
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...humanitarian aids being imported in instead of....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 20 Apr 10 07:31
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Decibels echo constantly in bare empty landfill sites

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 19 Apr 10 12:24
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Egotism gives others time inspecting splendid me!

Iain

 
From General Discussion / This is the First
Posted 19 Apr 10 12:21
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...bladder after drinking....

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Did Man Land on the Moon
Posted 19 Apr 10 12:18
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There are two van allen belts, an inner one and an outer one.

The inner one (situated between 300 and 1000 km up, depending on a variety of factors) is comprised of protons, or positively charged particles, commonly referred to as Alpha radiation. This can be stopped with a thin piece of card.

The outer belt situated at 10,000 to 40,000 km depending on a variety of factors (magnetic intensity, Earth's position to the sun, and solar wind intensity) is comprised of electrons, the negatively charged particles. At a height of solar intensity when the wind is strong, the earth's magnetic field is strong and our position in our orbit, these electrons can reach 10 Megaelectron volts, enough to disable an unprotected satellite or kill an unprotected human. This belt is quite narrow, a few kilometres across.

During the moon shots, very little was known about the belts, with them only having been discovered 15 years prior to the Apollo missions.

By sheer damned luck, the moon shots took place at a low in the cycle, otherwise, with the limited aluminium shielding protecting the capsule, Buzz Aldrin would be dead by now. However, the length of time of exposure, even at full energies, would mean that it took years for the effects to show. Aldrin has said that even if it had been a one way trip, he would still have gone.

Strangely, not one of the skeptics of the moon shots is willing to stump up the several million dollars required to prove that the moon landings were faked: pointing the Hubble at the Sea of Tranquility and looking. The module will be plainly visible next to the laser reflector that scientists have since used to determine with great precision the distance to the moon. NASA won't point the Hubble there to prove the landings happened because they know it would make no difference (see Chandryaan below), and only people who cherry pick the evidence believe otherwise.

The problem I have with conspiracy theories such as the moon landing one, is the sheer number of people who were involved. There were thousands of people involved in the six moon landings and one failure, plus nine missions there and back. ALL of them would have to be quiet about it. On top of this NASA would somehow have to fabricate the 382kilos of moon rock. Compare this with the 40kilos of moon rock that have fallen because of meteorite impact with the moon throwing up debris, and it becomes the simplest explanation that the 382 kilos were brought back by Apollo 11 to 17.

Finally, the Chandrayaan 1 spacecraft has taken pictures of the landing sites. However the Conspiracy theorists would have you believe that the Indians are now in cahoots with NASA in order to get the pictures of the lunar lander onto the Chandrayaan 1's pictures. If NASA took them there, and let them breath the tenuous lunar atmosphere until the saliva boiled off their tongue, they still wouldn't change their view point.

So...there's stuff left on the moon from six landings, a laser reflector precisely placed so we can fire a laser at the moon and see how far away it is, tons of video, still and sound recordings of being there, images from other space agencies, thousands of people who were there doing it, and a third of a tonne of moon rock. On the other side, we have a couple of pictures that don't make sense to people without a high school diploma in basic physics, and the fact that it was dangerous and expensive. Although the NASA would agree with the last two, but it didn't stop them.

Occam's razor would suggest that the simplest explanation is that twelve men have walked on the moon. To the conspiracy theorists, I say: Get a life. You're wrong, move on.

Iain

 
From News Discussion / Not the Large Hadron Collider
Posted 19 Apr 10 08:10
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Very VERY very (very) clever.

Iain

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 16 Apr 10 22:01
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Druids really upset Ike's dodgy stomach

Iain

 
54 Pages - «« « 34 35 [36] 37 38 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

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