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From General Discussion / FARCEBOOK!
Posted 27 Apr 11 16:53
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JOIN FARCEBOOK:


Bureau had a good bowel movement this morning.

 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 25 Apr 11 23:40
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"Say Sweaty..Sweety. That had to be the loudest fart I ever heard in here. If it was a wet one, let's go over to my place where you can change."

"If I said you had a plentiful body would you hold it against me? I mean beautiful! Beautiful! Get Off Me! Get Off Me! i can't breathe."

 
From News Discussion / Amish and Hassidic Jews Get Into Brawl About Which Group Is More Backwards and Humble
Posted 25 Apr 11 16:34
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Very funny.

But let's not forget that most humble of them all, TheSpoof writer. I humbly submit that he/she may be #1.

 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 25 Apr 11 16:25
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Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bars:

"I may be drunk...but IF you were MY wife...Oh, hee hee hee. I'm sorry Hon. I wath just joking.....OW!"

 
From General Discussion / Lady Godiva
Posted 24 Apr 11 15:23
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I'll second that. She was a lot of fun on any subject I brought up on here.

 
From General Discussion / The "Grand Ole Opry" Do "All Beatles Night":
Posted 24 Apr 11 13:03
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It's The Beatles Night at The Grand Old Opry:


"The Fool on the Hillbilly"

"A Day in the Wife"

"Across the Universe to Old Man Kelsey's Woods"

"You've Got to Hide Your Love of Mountain Oysters"

"You Won't See Me (Hunkered Down Back Here in the Bushes)"

 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 24 Apr 11 12:58
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Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bars:

"Pardon me, but haft you seen my movie, "An Incontinental Tooth?"

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 24 Apr 11 02:13
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Let me know when you start the mag series.

Scenes cut from "The Wizard of Oz":

Scene where several of the Munchkins are beating up on Dopey, Grumpy and Gumby who had wandered over from the Disney studio. Actually, Gumby was never the same afterward and was replaced by Doc who treated him.

 
From News Discussion / Manchester United Purchased In Hostile Takeover
Posted 23 Apr 11 21:03
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The Monterrey Chupacabras? Interesting idea.

Maybe we could understand soccer a bit more.

Maybe the NFL could expand to Europe, South & Central America?

Lots to think about. Lots of good baseball players in Cuba. Stir up baseball that's been dragging it's behind.



 
From News Discussion / Daffy Duck To Distribute "Rabbit Seasoning"
Posted 23 Apr 11 14:23
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J-Man,

Welcome back. You have been missed.

I just got back on the forums to start some funny subjects. I'm off the rest but there are a lot of new writers there.

Great story. Hope we get more of the early crew back on.

-Bureau

 
From General Discussion / The "Grand Ole Opry" Do "All Beatles Night":
Posted 23 Apr 11 13:35
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The "Grand Ole Opry" Do "All Beatles Night":


"A Taste of Balony"

"Stacked Naturally"

"The Ballad of the John & Blow-Hole"

"I Get By with a Little Hemp from My Friends"

"A Lard Day's Night"


 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 23 Apr 11 13:04
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You should send in your idea for a movie spoof, Jean.

Scenes cut from "The Wizard of Oz":

Dorothy: Now which way do we go?
Scarecrow: Pardon me, this way is a very nice way.
Dorothy: Who said that?
[Toto barks at scarecrow]
Dorothy: Don't be silly, Toto. Scarecrows don't talk.
Scarecrow: They do after your little dog takes a whiz on my leg and shoe! Tell him it's 'Wizard', not 'Whizzered'.

(Cut! Cut! Go clean up and change your shoes, Bolger!)



 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 23 Apr 11 12:53
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Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar:


"Say, you remind me of that beautiful sexy long-legged magician's assistant I saw last week at the .....Pock! Pock, Pock,Pock! Pock, pock, pock, pock-pock-ock!!"

 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 22 Apr 11 22:10
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Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar:

"You must be a maggot because I'm drawn to you! Did I say magnet? I meant maggot!..........(Whoommpp!).....shumbody call 911!"

 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 22 Apr 11 18:22
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Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar:

"If you were one of my h-hemorrhoids, H-Honey, you'd be the first one I scratched."

 
From General Discussion / Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar
Posted 22 Apr 11 16:13
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Top Pick-Up Lines by Drunks at Bar:

"I'm headin' out to the car park to puke. Care to join me?"

"Shay, are you from Tennessee? You're tha only Ten Eye on me. I think I screwed that up."



 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 22 Apr 11 15:57
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Those are great!

Scenes cut from "The Wizard of Oz":

Ray Bolger (Scarecrow) jotting down notes while the Cowardly Lion was singing "If I Were King".

Later Bolger, having fallen on hard times, sells the jotted down lyrics to "Black Crow Blues" to Bob Dylan who included it on his "Another Side of Bob Dylan" LP.



 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 11 Apr 11 14:23
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Scenes cut from The Wizard of Oz:

Attempting to knock off King Kong as a rival movie, the scene where all one-hundred flying monkeys jump off the Empire State Building safely.

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 9 Apr 11 21:00
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Scenes cut from the Wizard of Oz:

TheSpoof scene where Dorothy sees a Bargis Tryhol Classic and begins chanting: "Lyins, Taggers and Bares...Oh My!"

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 8 Apr 11 23:07
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Fact: Before they settled upon using "The Lollipop Guild", they had thought of using the term, "The All Day Suckers".

Also cut from the Wizard of Oz film, the whole autopsy scene where the coroner examined the witch killed when the house fell on her. If everyone had seen that, he wouldn't have to tell anyone that she was "most sincerely dead!".

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 7 Apr 11 16:48
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Wicked Witch blows her lines and yells loudly "..AND THAT GOES FOR YOUR LITTLE DONG TOO!". "Hey, why are all the Munchkins walking out?"

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 4 Apr 11 12:08
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Scenes cut from "The Wizard of Oz":

The scene where the "Horse of Many Colors" dyed.

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 3 Apr 11 19:11
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Yes, Lahr was a heartbreaker, with his rugged good looks. Some say he was the reason that Clark Gable turned to cursing near the end of "Gone With The Wind".

Many still believe that Lahr was the actual father of actors Al Pacino and James Caan who were both born a year later (1940). Even the critics admit that the resemblance is amazing.

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 3 Apr 11 18:02
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Scenes cut from The Wizard of Oz:

At least three members of the Lollipop Guild heaving by a tree after seeing up the skirt of the witch.

Fact:

Bert Lahr was originally cast as Rhett Butler for "Gone With The Wind" while Clark Gable was to play the Cowardly Lion, but there was a mix-up during 1938 contracts before either movie was filmed.

 
From General Discussion / Scenes Cut From "The Wizard of Oz"
Posted 2 Apr 11 19:14
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Little Known Fact: It was seeing those Ruby Red Slippers as a ten-year-old that drove Emelda Marcos to the foot fetish that she would have the rest of her life!

 
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