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From News Discussion / The Incredible Hulk Opens Expanding Trousers Shop In Dorking
Posted 5 Nov 12 18:47
Message
A sure fire compo winner if ever I saw one.

I say a sure fire compo winner if ever I saw one!

One thumb!

Bastard!

Aaaarrrrghh!!!

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Hurricane Sandy
Posted 30 Oct 12 23:10
Message
Stay safe Gentlemen.

All the best.

Skoob.

 
From News Discussion / Ali Bullo To Remove The 'Big Jimmy' From Kebab Van Menus
Posted 28 Oct 12 20:35
Message
Cheers Frankie.

Too easy to go OTT with a story like this. To be honest with you, I was once infatuated with an eleven year old girl. Mind you, I was the same age myself. I used to fantasize about rescuing her from a fire or some similar disaster.

I think her family moved to Australia.

I don't blame them.

Regards

Skoob.

 
From News Discussion / Ali Bullo To Remove The 'Big Jimmy' From Kebab Van Menus
Posted 28 Oct 12 14:24
Message
Cheers mate

Regards

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Jimmy Savile
Posted 25 Oct 12 14:11
Message
 
From General Discussion / Jimmy Savile
Posted 24 Oct 12 17:13
Message
Who knows where it'll all end?

Shameful.

Regards

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Slavery, thats what it is, Slavery
Posted 24 Oct 12 17:09
Message
You leave my missus out of this, you cad. She's good to me. Too good in fact. So good that she's got me typing this with a loaded gun aimed at my head.

I have to laugh...because she's a really crap shot.

BLAM!

*THUD*

 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 23 Oct 12 19:47
Message
Dear Spoof

Please convey my thanks to Mr Hobbs.

Aaaaarrrrrrghhhh!

Desperate.

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Waiting
Posted 23 Oct 12 17:47
Message
I'm waiting to watch United v Braga in the CL. Been up since 5 this morning, and feeling a bit cream crackered, but once the match starts, I'll be waiting for bedtime.

ZZzzzzzzzz......lovely.....


Regardzzzzzzzzzzzz

Hup! Sorry....

Skoob

 
From General Discussion / Which living or historic person would you like to bitch-slap?
Posted 23 Oct 12 17:37
Message
Pyromaniacs? Blow em all up!

Regards

Skoob.

 
From Magazine Discussion / My life as a man #23
Posted 23 Oct 12 17:03
Message
Only thing I can say is "Bravo!"

Read this. A fitting tribute to a lifelong friend.

Regards

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Which living or historic person would you like to bitch-slap?
Posted 23 Oct 12 16:24
Message
Richard Madeley

Jimmy Savile

Michael Jackson

Jack The Ripper

Hitler

Pontius Pilate

Jose Mourinho

Will Self

Salman Rushdie

Ian Hislop

And if I was a girl - not that I'd in any way condone violence against the fairer sex:

Princess Diana

Katie Price

Joan Collins

Denise Richards (The Agony Aunt from This Morning)

Kerry Katona

And if I was gay: Jimmy Summerville and that bloke I used to work with.

Regards

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Which living or historic person would you like to bitch-slap?
Posted 22 Oct 12 16:58
Message
I'd bitch slap John Terry if I could. Trouble is, he's bigger than me, and younger than me, so he'd probably kick me head in and then chat the wife up.

Or something.

Regards

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Does Anyone Know....
Posted 22 Oct 12 15:56
Message
John,

Are you clicking the correct link? It's the one at the bottom which says: 'Didscuss This Story In The Forum'

Hope this helps.

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Let's Talk About Sex
Posted 21 Oct 12 20:44
Message
Phil,

That's a pretty awful acronym.

We were talking about sex. I've been wanked off in a bus stop.

Oh yes!

True that, Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Let's Talk About Sex
Posted 21 Oct 12 18:08
Message
And when you're fucked all over the place...

You are completely fucked.

Just sayin'

Skoob.

 
From News Discussion / Downturn at Downton Abbey - Financial crisis can't even escape fictional historical drama
Posted 21 Oct 12 16:08
Message
BLIMEY!

5er

Regards

Skoob

 
From Magazine Discussion / Lecture in Nottingham by Prof. Grimesworthy
Posted 21 Oct 12 15:19
Message
A different and hugely enjoyable approach to story telling by our very own inch high private eye.

5 from me.

Regards

Skoob.

 
From News Discussion / 1966 World Cup Final Footage Was Doctored By BBC Technicians - England Have Never Won The World Cup!
Posted 21 Oct 12 01:18
Message
Not even worthy of a comment...

Just sayin'

 
From General Discussion / Let's Talk About Sex
Posted 20 Oct 12 21:01
Message
It's a wonderful and beautiful thing when it's shared with the love of one's life. It isn't bad even when you aren't all that bothered who you're doing it with.

I did it once, and found it quite enjoyable, even though there was only myslef present.

But when you get to my age, a nice steak and kidney pie seems more wholesome than drooling over Britney Spears dressed as a schoolgirl.

Or is it just me?

Regards

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 20 Oct 12 20:11
Message
Dear Spoof

While we're on the subject of books - the Dorking Review 2 is coming out soon. And there's a launch piss up at the Coal Hole on December 15th.

I hope I don't fall off Waterloo Bridge, but I'll be buggered if I'm paying four squids for a one stop tube ride.

(Take note TFL)

Bobby Bollocks
Southampton.

 
From Magazine Discussion / Presidential Order protects voters this election
Posted 20 Oct 12 13:55
Message
"Safety conscientious" or "Safety conscious"? "Insure" or "Ensure"?

Couldn't make head or tail of this.

Just sayin'

Skoob.

 
From General Discussion / Jaggedone's Book is on the shelves!
Posted 20 Oct 12 13:47
Message
Did I just say 'bacon tree'? I meant a 'ham bush.'

AND THAT'S MY FINAL WORD ON THIS!

I'm locking this thread. Now then, now then, where's me keys...?

Victor Vanquish
Scarborough

 
From General Discussion / Jaggedone's Book is on the shelves!
Posted 20 Oct 12 13:45
Message
The Coal Hole Firm? It's probably a bacon tree.

AND THAT'S MY FINAL WORD ON THIS!

N Pledge
Poland.

 
From General Discussion / Jaggedone's Book is on the shelves!
Posted 20 Oct 12 13:20
Message
There is no 'Coal Hole Firm.'

AND THAT'S MY FINAL WORD ON THE SUBJECT!

Captain Maggot
The Strand.


 
418 Pages - «« « 5 6 [7] 8 9 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

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