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From General Discussion / Is It Just Me Or...
Posted 15 Dec 08 22:03
Yeah, old Twiglet might be knocking on a bit but she's still worth sharing a cab with.

Merry Christmas, and to hell with all this 'Happy Holiday' crap.

I had a Christmas break in NYC once and it was so cold my teeth exploded and my bum fell off.

From General Discussion / Is It Just Me Or...
Posted 12 Dec 08 17:53
Is that girl with the curly hair off the M&S adverts just drop dead gorgeous?
Every time I see her she makes me smile.
I once showed her picture to Mrs Skoob, who wasn't impressed.
I was impressed though.
God, talk about going weak at the knees...

From News Discussion / Zombies - Nothing To Be Scared Of Says Drunken Scientist
Posted 3 Dec 08 23:36
Wires crossed?
Or is it just me?
Answers on the back of a fifty squid note.

From News Discussion / England Pays Tribute To Its Football Hooligan Heroes
Posted 3 Dec 08 23:32
I've been on that bus too.
Toughest assignment: Aston Villa - fuckers never know when they're beaten, they just keep coming back.
Most hostile place: Cardiff - 'You won't be going back there will you boyo.'
I still have nightmares.

From News Discussion / House Of Horrors - Police Search Continues
Posted 3 Dec 08 23:27
We've all had it Blaster. If it wasn't the oriental woman it was fucking white horses frolicking in rivers.
Nice to know that someone else has been damaged for life.

From General Discussion / Christmas presents
Posted 3 Nov 08 00:21
Dear Buckwheat's Butt
I should be so lucky.
Best Regards.

From General Discussion / Christmas presents
Posted 2 Nov 08 18:29
Dear Bent Copper
Did I once hear you say, 'Don't be silly son. give me the gun..'
And did you also know that Jack 'Dickson Of Dock Green' Warner was in his eighties when he filmed that series, and that further, he had dodgy knees.
Stick with me son, look and learn.

From News Discussion / I Shagged Jonathan Ross's Grandma Says Manuel
Posted 1 Nov 08 11:28
Thanks for the feedback. Glad you enjoyed it. I'm just surprised that nobody else thought to hit it from that angle.

From News Discussion / Nebula Federation chooses planet Earth as the official 'Intergalactic Fool Repository.'
Posted 24 Oct 08 01:04
My Dear Rusty

You are on Arthur Pewty's hit list.
Expect a bad day, like maybe your alarm clock won't go off or something.
You have been warned.
Neasden won't tolerate disrespect.

Arthur Pewty is no gangster, nor a Monty Python character, he is alive, and living in Neasden.

From News Discussion / Dog Shits Everywhere When Owner Collapses - Doesn't Dial 911
Posted 17 Oct 08 20:55
You're very welcome Duncan. As I type this I've got one cat just sprung onto my lap and a second one trying to look hard done by. They think I'll probably feed them, the suckers. I'm more likely to to take the bastards out the back and cut their fucking throats with my trusty Sabatier.

From News Discussion / Black-and-White Army to be SAVED by Trillionaires!
Posted 17 Oct 08 13:59
Oh yes, like anybody gives a fuck...

From News Discussion / Dog Shits Everywhere When Owner Collapses - Doesn't Dial 911
Posted 17 Oct 08 13:55
That story was fucking brilliant. I am literally rolling round on the floor laughing my fucking bollocks off.
Let's have more of this!

416 Pages - «« « 412 413 414 415 [416]
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