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From General Discussion / Celebrities Now Hiding Out Here
Posted 21 Jul 17 00:08
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I understand that certain celebrities are avoiding exposure by hiding here.

 
From General Discussion / Humour Rights in China
Posted 14 Jul 17 21:10
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Everyone needs humour.

It is a basic right.

Am I wrong?


Quote: Sir Geoffroy Cockface


Quote: victor nicholas

Why so upset.


My uncle Geoffcock had a humour removed from his intestine. There's nothing funny about that.


 
From General Discussion / Humour Rights in China
Posted 14 Jul 17 01:44
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Why so upset.

 
From General Discussion / Wombats
Posted 13 Jul 17 03:42
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In more refined company the t in wombat is silent.

 
From General Discussion / The Queen's on Holidays
Posted 9 Jul 17 02:41
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What on earth would she be doing?

 
From General Discussion / Cleckheaton is "Coprophagia Capital of Europe" Claims Ted Moult's Nephew
Posted 2 Jul 17 03:02
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And now for a word from our sponsor celebrating Mississipi John Hurt who played a melody and more finger picking the blues.

 
From News Discussion / Britain's homeless population relieved to hear Prince Philip still alive and well
Posted 21 Jun 17 23:37
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If there is hope for the poor worn out Dell screens that illuminate this venerable repository for well meaning scribes this excellent work is it.

Biting satire guaranteed to raise laughter from the most hardened soul.

 
From News Discussion / Tabloid newspaper has been infiltrated by Russians
Posted 18 Jun 17 14:13
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Quite interesting news.

 
From General Discussion / Newsfeed Slow
Posted 3 Jun 17 02:16
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Is old fake news just history.

 
From General Discussion / Newsfeed Slow
Posted 2 Jun 17 02:35
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I have noticed that the BBC news page is getting a bit stale.

Has Mark taken over editorial duties.

 
From General Discussion / Hipstery
Posted 31 May 17 23:16
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The history of hipsters.

 
From General Discussion / Ellard Presley
Posted 30 May 17 00:07
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A Newfie buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for market on his farm. After a few weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The Newfie doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to reveal his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs are pregnant.

The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnant. The Newfie hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the pigs. So he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each pig twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes to find the pigs are still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the pigs and, returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The next morning, the Newfie cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are lying in the mud. "No," she says, "But Lard Jaises, dem pigs has all got in da truck and one of dem's honkin' da horn!".

 
From News Discussion / Carrot Top Declines FBI Director Job
Posted 22 May 17 02:03
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What a good idea.

 
From General Discussion / Trump a Shakespearean Play
Posted 19 May 17 02:09
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Wherefore to shall our great leader take us
Comey has has been cast down and Flynn has flown
His winsome daughter councils him though wise or unwise the gods themselves are worse for worry
Better to bare bodkins posthaste before black days and blood bathes our brothers

 
From General Discussion / Trump a Shakespearean Play
Posted 18 May 17 04:16
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Such speech to ape overshadows
Misplaced manners by the measure
While cunning lawyers darken hallways and drama thickens
Brutus would lay sleepless counting the Tweeting stab wounds of the fall

 
From General Discussion / Mafeking - Use in a sentence
Posted 16 May 17 01:41
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Mafeking head hurts sofa king bad

 
From General Discussion / Mafeking - Use in a sentence
Posted 14 May 17 21:26
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Where's Mafeking boots?

 
From General Discussion / Ivanka Trump FBI Director
Posted 14 May 17 01:00
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Yes, cabaret skills should be evaluated for all proponents.

Hoover could both lead and follow, a high standard to uphold.

 
From General Discussion / Ivanka Trump FBI Director
Posted 13 May 17 21:58
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I think they both painted their toenails.

 
From General Discussion / Ivanka Trump FBI Director
Posted 13 May 17 20:22
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She does have feminine intuition

 
From General Discussion / World's last living Nazi war crimes prosecutor passes on chilling message about conflict
Posted 13 May 17 00:03
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Vollendam is a good memory well remembered

Quote: Erskin Quint

You have painted a wonderful picture there though, worthy of many a Dutch master.




Quote: victor nicholas

Erskin

Mountaineering in the lowlands is not without it's dangers as I recall losing an alarm clock shortly thereafter.

The good natured insanity of the populace would no doubt make JO hard to pick out in a crowd.


Quote: Erskin Quint

Were you on a mountaineering expedition?

I must say that the 'youth football teams in uniform marching past' is quite the sinister image.

I think the sight of youth football teams marching through lace-chimneyed historic villages, with sailboards with leeboats and herrings drying in tulip-festooned cottage-gardens, would be quite enough to trigger my fight or flight mechanisms.


Quote: victor nicholas

No but your suggestion of Uden, Uddel, Urmond even Uithuizemeeden has the makings of a good Octoberfest drinking song Oi Oi Oi!

I did pass through the lowlands as a young man and recall lace curtains in the windows of homes in historic villages, sailboats with leeboards and youth football teams in uniform marching past me while I was enjoying a herring burger, or is this simply an idyllic dream longing for fruition.


Quote: Jaggedone

VC, your geographical knowledge of the lowlands is quite outstanding, I sense you mean Uden? Uddel? Urmond? even Uithuizermeeden?

Never mind, they're all as flat as a pancake and were even flatter after Adolf marched over them...






 
From General Discussion / World's last living Nazi war crimes prosecutor passes on chilling message about conflict
Posted 12 May 17 22:54
Message
The same author must have written surrealistic assembly instructions for all goods made in China or Mexico.

I can understand Mexico wanting to increase sales of alcohol as result but not China's motives, they are inscrutable by nature or design.

 
From General Discussion / World's last living Nazi war crimes prosecutor passes on chilling message about conflict
Posted 12 May 17 12:52
Message
Erskin

Mountaineering in the lowlands is not without it's dangers as I recall losing an alarm clock shortly thereafter.

The good natured insanity of the populace would no doubt make JO hard to pick out in a crowd.


Quote: Erskin Quint

Were you on a mountaineering expedition?

I must say that the 'youth football teams in uniform marching past' is quite the sinister image.

I think the sight of youth football teams marching through lace-chimneyed historic villages, with sailboards with leeboats and herrings drying in tulip-festooned cottage-gardens, would be quite enough to trigger my fight or flight mechanisms.


Quote: victor nicholas

No but your suggestion of Uden, Uddel, Urmond even Uithuizemeeden has the makings of a good Octoberfest drinking song Oi Oi Oi!

I did pass through the lowlands as a young man and recall lace curtains in the windows of homes in historic villages, sailboats with leeboards and youth football teams in uniform marching past me while I was enjoying a herring burger, or is this simply an idyllic dream longing for fruition.


Quote: Jaggedone

VC, your geographical knowledge of the lowlands is quite outstanding, I sense you mean Uden? Uddel? Urmond? even Uithuizermeeden?

Never mind, they're all as flat as a pancake and were even flatter after Adolf marched over them...




 
From General Discussion / World's last living Nazi war crimes prosecutor passes on chilling message about conflict
Posted 12 May 17 02:42
Message
No but your suggestion of Uden, Uddel, Urmond even Uithuizemeeden has the makings of a good Octoberfest drinking song Oi Oi Oi!

I did pass through the lowlands as a young man and recall lace curtains in the windows of homes in historic villages, sailboats with leeboards and youth football teams in uniform marching past me while I was enjoying a herring burger, or is this simply an idyllic dream longing for fruition.


Quote: Jaggedone

VC, your geographical knowledge of the lowlands is quite outstanding, I sense you mean Uden? Uddel? Urmond? even Uithuizermeeden?

Never mind, they're all as flat as a pancake and were even flatter after Adolf marched over them...


 
From General Discussion / World's last living Nazi war crimes prosecutor passes on chilling message about conflict
Posted 11 May 17 13:05
Message
JO

Udder sounds very Dutch, perhaps Protestant, near Vollendam and and Markham.

 
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Stefano M. Stefano
Stefano M. Stefano
Joined: 19 April 2007
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