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From General Discussion / Hear any good Michael Jackson jokes?
Posted 3 Jul 09 12:16
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Apparently, his best friend of Elizabeth Taylor is reputed to have said "I really loved Michael - he's just drop dead gorgeous."
~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Plagiarism
Posted 1 Jul 09 17:56
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I remember once that the subject of plagiarism was in question on this site and to make a point, Duncan Whitehead wrote a story about Sir Alex Ferguson falling over during a football match. He then sent me a copy and also Fergus McCarthy and we were all supposed to submit the same story on the same night. However, what we really did was write the same story in our own words and compare the number of hits.

Although it was the same story, it contained all the same ingredients. I don't think Mark noticed and they were certainly published. The result was hilarious!

Sir Alex shaken, not stirred

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 30 Jun 09 21:21
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stationary trains and trams ignite on a railway yard


"Y'ard?": What a hooker might say to a man who's just taken Viagra.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 30 Jun 09 13:37
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spokesman peel off knickers erotically, silently mincing a negligee

 
From General Discussion / Someone Send The Daily Telegraph Here!
Posted 30 Jun 09 12:56
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Quote: Jalapenoman

5* rating delivered


Thanx J-Man

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 30 Jun 09 11:53
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sweat with excited athlete's trainers

 
From General Discussion / Someone Send The Daily Telegraph Here!
Posted 30 Jun 09 11:46
Message

Quote: Jalapenoman


Quote: IN SEINE

Don't go Postal! Have you seen the price of a stamp?

Q: what was Michael Jackson's last hit?

A: the floor

~IS~


Have you posted that one in the jokes section yet? Go for it. I'll give it 5 stars when you do.


Okay, J-man, it's up on the page and waiting for your 5*

~IS~



 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 29 Jun 09 19:32
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Quote: Jaggedone

secretive enemies create reckless terror in volatile Ecuador




Ecuador cowers under a dictatorship of robbers


 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 29 Jun 09 18:25
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sorry about that, we're on sons now!

sons of Nuns: secretive

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 29 Jun 09 18:20
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Quote: Skoob1999

YELLOW EXEMPLIFIES LOW LIFE OCCIDENTAL WANKERS

Chew on that you bugger!

Skoob.


wankers are not kinky, erection-rubbing scumbags


~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Someone Send The Daily Telegraph Here!
Posted 29 Jun 09 16:07
Message
Don't go Postal! Have you seen the price of a stamp?

Q: what was Michael Jackson's last hit?

A: the floor

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Someone Send The Daily Telegraph Here!
Posted 29 Jun 09 15:13
Message
They ain't seen nothing yet!

Michael Jackson conspiracy theories

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 29 Jun 09 14:37
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

SITES INTRINSICALLY TEST EVERY SENSATION

Skoob.


sensation expediates new sexual activity to indians or necrophilliacs

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 29 Jun 09 13:59
Message
gardens are really drug enriched neighbourhood sites


~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Billy Mays makes it five dead celebrities in two weeks
Posted 29 Jun 09 13:47
Message

Quote: victor nicholas

If you call now you can get another celebrity absolutely free.



"NOW!!!"


Where's my free celebrity Victor?



I'm waiting...


still waiting.........


"I should've known not to trust a Doctor.." allegedly Michael Jackson's last words


~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Billy Mays makes it five dead celebrities in two weeks
Posted 29 Jun 09 13:37
Message

Quote: queen mudder

The Great Spoof Cluedo Game!

1 Queen Elizabeth II

2 On July 4th, Independence Day

3 In Holyrood Castle's Gun Room (ok, maybe Gin Room...)

4 The butler did it.



The Great Spoof Cluedo Game!

1 Monkey Woods

2 On April 1st - Awfuls Day

3 In Dudley Library

4 Mark Lowton.


 
From General Discussion / Anyone see anything about Michael Jackson on TV recently?
Posted 27 Jun 09 21:26
Message

Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Being dead is a real drag!


could be worse...

I wouldn't want to be Mark Lowton at the moment, being inundated with Michael Jackson stories.

I feel sorry for him and he should put a ban on it now. I am trying to write something new to break the habit.

~IS~

 
From News Discussion / Lowton Laughing All The Way To The Bank After Jackson Death
Posted 27 Jun 09 17:52
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5* from me Dunc.

Just one query: does Lowton have a red chopper or a yellow chopper?

(He must've passed his cycling proficiency test and progressed from the Raleigh Chipper then!)

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Al Sharpton Is A Lying Bastard.
Posted 27 Jun 09 10:21
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

This really pisses me off. Al Sharpton, talking outside the Apollo Theater in Harlem moments ago says that Michael Jackson started Live Aid.

Excuse me, but wasn't that all kicked off by Midge Ure and Bob Geldof? Did the Wacko paedo ever appear? Think not.

Regards

Skoob.


Sharpton is so wrong, wrong. wrong.

It was Al Gore or invented 'Live Aid'.

It is now very clear that Michael Jackson invented 'Dead Aid'.


~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Graffiti - Is It Art?
Posted 26 Jun 09 19:32
Message

Quote: Jalapenoman

It depends where it is at.

Generally, it is mostly VANDALISM!


Agreed!

However, the best graffiti is usually a witty remark.

E.g. someone wrote: "Grils are stupid!"
somebody added: "Don't you mean girls?"
Some wit added: "What about us Grils?"


~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 26 Jun 09 18:35
Message

Quote: Jaggedone


sentences enable nerds to enjoy nerds, clever-dicks, Einstein's sanity!


sanity almost never intimidates the youth

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Strewth!!!!
Posted 25 Jun 09 16:54
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

Quality.

Wish I'd seen it first!

(Here he goes again...)

There is a group of wallabies thriving in the wild in Derbyshire.

Or did I just dream it?

Regards

Skoob.


Yes, but they are not like the Australian Wallabies, they are not 'stoned' (however, they may have bricks thrown at them)

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / 56 Star Tequila
Posted 25 Jun 09 07:18
Message

Quote: victor nicholas

Catchy name.


Hmmm..........

Stellar Artois perchance?

Is it that stuff they sell in Belgian tattoo parlous?

Who knows, we could end up with an entire constellation!

~IS~

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 23 Jun 09 19:53
Message
Stresses tighten relaxed, elongated, super-sized editorial sentences!

~IS~

 
From News Discussion / Wimbledon 2009 Drama As Queue Stretches Around The Corner
Posted 22 Jun 09 15:39
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

Hang on ~IS~

You can't be the same 'people'. People is plural.

You could however be the same 'Person'

'Person' is singular.

Oh just ignore me. The wife's at work and I'm bored. Just call me a nitpicking motherfucker.

Best Regards ~IS~

Skoob.


Yes, you're quite right! 'Person' is singular. I'm very sorry for my mistake.

BTW: are you sure you're not Monkey Woods as well? because that is the kind of thing he would often pick me up on!

Pedantically yours

~IS~

 
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