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From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 9 Feb 09 16:00
Message

Quote: IN SEINE

NUDE EDITOR'S ELECTRONIC DEVICE (Mark Lowton bought one from Maplins!)


You flipping dipstick! The word is NEED!

To make it simple for you, INSEINE:

Need Editor's electronic device.

 
From General Discussion / Whoops!
Posted 9 Feb 09 15:58
Message

Quote: IN SEINE

So can you prove your a Muslim?




How, exactly, is this done?

By the way, what does "your a Muslim?" mean?

Can you prove you're insane? More to the point, can you prove you're not? What can you prove?

Can you prove it?

 
From News Discussion / Nadal And Federer On Fire In Australian Open Tennis Final
Posted 9 Feb 09 14:05
Message
Done it.

 
From News Discussion / Number Six Dead
Posted 9 Feb 09 14:02
Message
Odd that you joined just a few days before his death...

 
From General Discussion / Spelling
Posted 9 Feb 09 13:11
Message
Aunty Sue will have to do.

Have you got your chalk ready?

 
From General Discussion / Spelling
Posted 9 Feb 09 13:06
Message
I'd be embarrassed if I couldn't spell millennium.

Try these for size:

relieved
received
conceived
believed

Look at them for four hours, then cover them over with a piece of card, or anything your Mum has handy. You can even ask Mum to read out the words whilst you write them on your blackboard, or a piece of paper.

Let me know how it went.

 
From News Discussion / Nadal And Federer On Fire In Australian Open Tennis Final
Posted 9 Feb 09 13:03
Message
This story doesn't seem funny anymore...


...if it ever was.

 
From General Discussion / Spelling
Posted 9 Feb 09 12:10
Message
Let me have a try


Quote: birbee

"embarrassed"




and


Quote: birbee

"millennium".




Although, I'm not sure I could've managed it without you, birbee!

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 9 Feb 09 07:54
Message
You're not banned, Ferg, any of you.

Gratification resonates a tad. Iron fist is cute, a term I often need.

 
From News Discussion / Clarkson Makes An Apology... Again!
Posted 8 Feb 09 20:58
Message
No, it's not funny in the slightest. Was it meant to be funny?

If it wasn't meant to be funny, all's well. Perhaps it was just a report that had got misdirected to the pages of TheSpoof.com instead of some other local publication like The Shrewsbury Chronicle. If so, it was a brilliant piece of investigative journalism.

Don't leave again, Trev. The place wasn't the same without you.

 
From General Discussion / Don't forget your empties, Skoob!
Posted 8 Feb 09 20:50
Message
Joe who?

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 8 Feb 09 20:47
Message
So, anyway, after you've all stopped fucking about, the word from here:

Posted: 8 Feb 09 17:52 - Edited By: Aspartame Boy, 8 Feb 09 18:16

is 'suspect'. No correspondence may be entered into.

Suspect usually suspects people exhibiting criminal tendencies.

 
From General Discussion / Whoops!
Posted 8 Feb 09 10:09
Message
Hull.

Does that make me illegal?

 
From General Discussion / Whoops!
Posted 7 Feb 09 23:03
Message

Quote: IN SEINE

Somebody said you were a Muslim.......is that right?




Yes.

What's an II?

 
From General Discussion / Whoops!
Posted 7 Feb 09 20:27
Message

Quote: IN SEINE

That describes Monkey Woods to a tee!

and yes he is a bastard too, but from W. Midlands.




Whoever told you I was from the West Midlands, Trev?

I can assure you, I am not. I merely live here at the moment.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 7 Feb 09 19:22
Message
Sex encourages xenophobia.

 
From News Discussion / US Airways announces daily flights to downtown NYC
Posted 7 Feb 09 19:19
Message
Funny you should all be talking about toilets. I posted this one earlier:

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s6i47624

I was tempted to edit it, and add in something about Hampstead Heath, but I couldn't be bothered.

 
From News Discussion / Jonathan Ross apologises for speech impediment
Posted 7 Feb 09 18:49
Message
Hello.




You wanker.

 
From News Discussion / Namnlös Man's Skrivmaskinen Äga vid Abba
Posted 7 Feb 09 18:46
Message
I tried to do one like this in Chinese during the Olympics, but when I published the story, there were 'major discrepancies' in the text.



 
From General Discussion / Mrs Skoob Unimpressed By Hubby's Domesticity
Posted 6 Feb 09 22:42
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

Monkey,

Just read your post to Mrs. Skoob.

She says she loves you, and would like to meet up real soon.

Skoob


Aw, Skoob. Come on, that's embarrassing. You know full well I don't do that kind of thing.

Is she fit?

 
From News Discussion / Jonathan Ross apologises for speech impediment
Posted 6 Feb 09 22:39
Message

Quote: Roy Turse

OK - maybe twins - separated at birth - brought up in different counties - struggling with their own issues - and then finding each other through a common medium?


No, wait. This deserves some investigation, Skoob.

How Roy knows, I'm not sure, but I was told that I did, in fact, have a twin brother, but that we were separated at birth.

Skoob ... Skoob ... is that you?

About that 50p. What's your postal address. I've a steaming turd to send you.

 
From General Discussion / Mrs Skoob Unimpressed By Hubby's Domesticity
Posted 6 Feb 09 22:33
Message
Just listen at you two! Talking endlessly about domestic chores, and other such shit.

Whatever happened to the Modern Man? The one who takes everything in his stride, and assumes control of the home by his insistence at doing everything in his power ti maintain his lofty position as Master of the House.

Women's Work? You jest! Any work is man's work, including the ironing.




That's why I get my 13-year-old son to do it.

 
From News Discussion / Jonathan Ross apologises for speech impediment
Posted 6 Feb 09 21:11
Message

Quote: Skoob1999

Just remember that Monkey is God and you'll be okay.

Skoob


I don't know how I'm supposed to respond to this ridiculous sarcasm.

I'll just say "Fuck you, Skoobybaby. Your shit stinks!" and leave it at that.

Roy, Christ knows how my name is at the top of the list. It could just as easily be any of the others.

There is an important thing to remember on here, and never was it more timely to remind myself of it now:

"Being #1 doesn't mean your stories are the best, merely that more people have read them."

 
From General Discussion / Don't forget your empties, Skoob!
Posted 6 Feb 09 21:04
Message
It wasn't Joe Brown the musician, was it?

 
From General Discussion / Don't forget your empties, Skoob!
Posted 6 Feb 09 19:57
Message
Saw this on the BBC, Skoob. Know the bloke?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/lancashire/7875395.stm

 
204 Pages - «« « 139 140 [141] 142 143 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

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