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From General Discussion / What to do...........
Posted 2 Feb 09 23:28
Message
OK, I got it, Project Manager.

What sort of project are we talking about?

 
From General Discussion / What to do...........
Posted 2 Feb 09 23:27
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Have I now got to guess what PCC means?

 
From General Discussion / What to do...........
Posted 2 Feb 09 23:24
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I can see this is going to be a difficult conversation.

Are you a builder? A plumber? Some sort of technician? A rent boy? Someone who cleans toilets, even though it's not strictly their job?

Help me.

 
From General Discussion / What to do...........
Posted 2 Feb 09 23:18
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What is your work?

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 2 Feb 09 23:17
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Efforts, far from original, raise tingling sensation.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 2 Feb 09 20:38
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Edible debris in bins looks exquisite.

 
From General Discussion / The Super Bowl.
Posted 2 Feb 09 20:34
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I watched the first quarter, but became confused when I realised it wasn't the St Louis Cardinals anymore.

They must have been losing money, and decided to sell the franchise and move.

I think that happened to a few teams.

Why do the Americans at sports events grin so much?

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s2i47256

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 2 Feb 09 19:55
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Snot: nasal overflow tissue.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 2 Feb 09 19:20
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Sweets were, effectively, early table salts.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 2 Feb 09 18:34
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Despot eats spaghetti (poached) on toast.

 
From General Discussion / Dear Miss Manners.....
Posted 1 Feb 09 23:49
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Yes, it is.

Got to go out early in morning to the hospital. Not looking good for the travel plans...

 
From General Discussion / Dear Miss Manners.....
Posted 1 Feb 09 23:41
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Evening.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 1 Feb 09 23:04
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Spasms, perhaps after sex, might satisfy.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 1 Feb 09 19:52
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Singles in nightclubs gyrate lazily, expecting suckage.

 
From News Discussion / English GCSE to allow text speak
Posted 31 Jan 09 10:48
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Brilliant. 5

By the way, Iain. Did you know that Hull City's record win in the FA Cup is currently 8-2?

Do you know which team that was against, Iain?

I'll let you think about it for a while.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 31 Jan 09 10:45
Message
Well, first of all, there's no 'e' on the end of it.

So,

Eccleston could create lame episodes; surely, Tennant overacted naively!

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 30 Jan 09 20:34
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You idiot. The last word was 'Eccleston' (tuts)

Get on with it.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 30 Jan 09 18:55
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Decadence evades categorisation, and decadence eludes none -

Christopher Eccleston.


 
From News Discussion / Robbie Fowler Arrested After Cocaine Found In Footballs
Posted 30 Jan 09 15:07
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Typical! I hadn't even noticed he was missing!

Curses on you, Dunc! Now I have to go and edit.




 
From General Discussion / Favourite Places
Posted 30 Jan 09 00:10
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He's the guitarist known as the Durutti Column.

Google it, Skoob. It's worth it.


Goodnight.

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Places
Posted 30 Jan 09 00:00
Message
My favourite recording artist is Vini Reilly, from your neck of the woods, Skoob.

You must have heard of him...

MB, that will have been Nelson's Column. Were the ice creams about £7?

 
From General Discussion / Game Consoles
Posted 29 Jan 09 23:31
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Quote: Skoob1999

Iain, Green Street.

I don't need to say any more. I once went to Upton Park to watch Burnley.




Skoob, me and my Dad went to see that Cup Semi Final Burnley v. Newcastle, I think maybe 1973, at Hillsbrough. We weren't supporting anyone, but a bloke from my Dad's work had got tickets for the seats where Newcastle fans were sitting, right above the terraces where the Burnley fans were standing.

After Newcastle scored, the Burnley fans below started chucking coins into our section, and a 50p hit my Dad on the shoulder. We laughed about it, but strange that they're still so generous these days, as they showed Drogba at the Bridge!

The hardest guy I ever came up against was at Oxford United. During the Maxwell days, we went down one Saturday in the sun when Oxford were doing well, and were top of the league. We were also pushing for promotion. This had to be early 80s. In those days, most fans liked to stand on the terraces singing songs, but we were part of the emerging trend of 'thugs in seats', and about fifty of us went in the seats down the touchline side.

*Incidentally, also at the game was Roy North, of Basil Brush fame. He is a Hull fan, and, probably living in London, had taken the opportunity to see his beloved Tigers.

Anyway, at half-time, we went towards the stairs to get a drink or summat, when this guy appeared at the top of the staiwell - a big, black guy with those fuckoff sideburns, long, brown leather coat like Shaft, arms outstretched inviting the City lads to "Come on!"

Some did, but were repelled. His arms were like high-powered windmill sails. This guy was hard, and fearless.

I still have dreams...

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Places
Posted 29 Jan 09 23:14
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I've never been to France!

I know you can't believe it, but you'll have to. I 've never been, honest!

Belgium, yes, Germany, yes, twice, Holland, Spain, yes, but never la belle France.

Germany was good. Stayed in Koln, visited Rudesheim, Bonn, Deutsches Ecke - lovely, and no arguments whatsoever over deckchairs. Perfectly hospitable and everyone spoke English. I tried to practise my German, but whoever I happened to be speaking to, sussed me for a Tommy before I'd finished the first sentence.

Oh, what fun!

 
From General Discussion / Barbaro
Posted 29 Jan 09 22:41
Message
I don't like horse racing either. I wrote a few stories about it on here. I found this one kicking about, but there are others as well:

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s6i31906

I didn't think the story in question deserved the rebuke it got above though...

 
From General Discussion / Favourite Places
Posted 29 Jan 09 22:36
Message
In England - Scarborough. I spoke about this already somewhere

Rest of the World - Bangkok

 
202 Pages - «« « 139 140 [141] 142 143 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

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