All times are GMT

Forum Home / Forum posts by Monkey Woods


210 Pages - [1] 2 3 4 5 » »»
From News Discussion / Bed allegedly commits assault
Posted 6 Sep 17 15:28
Message
Indeed.

Hope all is well in Skoobworld.

Camus was right: life is absurd.

I'm not going to give in though, I don't think.

 
From News Discussion / Britain's homeless population relieved to hear Prince Philip still alive and well
Posted 6 Sep 17 15:26
Message
I'm bored.

Are we all going to die? From the effects of nuclearisation, I mean.

Merry Christmas to one and all on the Spoof!

 
From News Discussion / Bed allegedly commits assault
Posted 27 Aug 17 13:04
Message
I must say that I didn't laugh much at this story. Indeed, I didn't laugh at all - sorry for lying initially.

Don't let me put you off, though.

I've decided to give it 5 stars, however. That's the kind of fucked-up individual I am.

Hope everybody's OK.

MK

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 27 Aug 17 12:57
Message
Delicious early lunch I cook is often uncommonly salty.

 
From News Discussion / Britain's homeless population relieved to hear Prince Philip still alive and well
Posted 22 Jun 17 08:56
Message
Couldn't have put it better myself, Vic.

I wanted to give it many more points, but he'll have to be satisfied with 5.



 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 21 Jun 17 02:57
Message
Ships: Hull is 'port supreme'.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 21 Jun 17 02:55
Message
Lots of tall ships.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 21 Jun 17 02:55
Message
Hull - universally liked, lots.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 18 Jun 17 15:40
Message
York or, realistically, Knaresborough.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 18 Jun 17 15:39
Message
Entry? Now try raiding York.

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 18 Jun 17 03:22
Message
Genuinely, Erskin. Newcastle University is not educational, like Yale.

 
From General Discussion / Wrongly-heard Lyrics
Posted 29 May 17 06:47
Message
5. Alison Moyet

"Love His Erection"


6. Nik Kershaw

"I Won't Let Your Son Go Down On Me"


7. Ian Dury and the Blockheads

"Sex & Drugs & Sausage Rolls"

 
From General Discussion / Readers' Rostrum
Posted 26 Apr 17 12:36
Message
Sir,

I would appreciate your getting back to me on this important issue.

Vicky,

Yes, the 's' has no sound in the name 'Camus', but I think that your French friends are leading you astray with its pronunciation, which should be 'Ca-moo'.

Hope this helped!

Monké

 
From News Discussion / Do-It-Yourself Future News Headlines
Posted 25 Apr 17 23:39
Message
"Things summed-up succinctly by man on spoof news website."

 
From General Discussion / Readers' Rostrum
Posted 25 Apr 17 23:35
Message
Does nobody have an opinion on M. Camus' book?

 
From General Discussion / Readers' Rostrum
Posted 25 Apr 17 09:59
Message
EQ, I have already ordered those books from Amazon, and will let you know what I think of them when they arrive, and I have had a chance to look at them.

In the meantime, let's continue - if that is the right word - our discussion on The Sis Of Miss Efus.

After you.

 
From General Discussion / Readers' Rostrum
Posted 24 Apr 17 04:07
Message
I'll go first, seeing as I started the fucking thread!

"The Cyst Of Missy Fuss" by Albert Camus (1942)

This is a book which I found extremely hard to read, and you will too, unless you are cleverer than me - which I doubt! It contains a lot of very long and complicated words which don't make any sense whatsoever, and, rather than being a book "once picked up, difficult to put down", I found it a book "once put down, almost impossible to pick up".

I shall explain why.

I had battled to page 48 of the book, and had already had thoughts of suicide, when I resolved to have "one more go" to finish it, or to burn it, Nazi-style.

Here's what I met:

"It is futile to be amazed by the apparent paradox that leads thought to its own negation by the opposite paths of humiliated reason and triumphal reason."

See where I'm coming from? A few lines further down:

"It is significant that the thought of the epoch is at once one of the most deeply imbued with a philosophy of the non-significance of the world and one of the most divided in its conclusions. It is constantly oscillating between extreme rationalization of reality which tends to break up that thought into standard reasons and its extreme irrationalization which tends to deify it."

Still awake?

Wickedly difficult to know what M. Camus is talking about, and the whole project made me wonder whether he came up with his notions whilst bathing in a tub full of Pernod!

Plus, not once in the whole book do we meet with the 'supposed' central character, Missy Fuss. I felt cheated, and so would you.

Monkey's View: Don't buy it! Give it a wide berth. Even at the library.

 
From General Discussion / Readers' Rostrum
Posted 24 Apr 17 03:39
Message
Hello, everybody, and welcome to 'Readers'Rostrum', the place where bookreaders can come to discuss the books they have read, or are reading, or are considering reading in the near future. Or any part of the future, really!

Any one can 'take the rostrum', and discuss a publication of his or her choice, and others can come in and take part, like a little readers' circle, if you will. I think it might be educational and fun!

No holding each others' cocks, though!

 
From General Discussion / Wrongly-heard Lyrics
Posted 24 Apr 17 03:31
Message
4. The Cure

"I'm the stranger, kissing an Arab"

 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 24 Apr 17 03:17
Message
Gambollings: a merry bout of larking; lolloping in 'nocturnal gambolling' style.

 
From News Discussion / CNN, Pat Robertson: God Stole Malaysia Flight
Posted 24 Apr 17 02:22
Message
A story of 'real importance'.

Real events, real people, real lives, real emotions, real meaning, real possibilities...need I go on?

Real questions, real feeling, real madrid, real sociedad etc

Has that plane been found yet?

I reckon God's got it.

 
From News Discussion / "Jesus And His Disciples Were Scottish", Claims Historian
Posted 23 Apr 17 01:29
Message

Quote: Jaggedone

We grow peas in our garden, I suppose EQ would rather resent that analogy...

Turnips too...

No, his grey cells are more like broccoli, much more suitable...



It's THIS man's brain that scientists need to take a closer look at, if you ask me. And even if you don't ask me, nothing will change about my assertion that the brain of Juggedone needs at least a cursory glance from some whitecoats.

See how the smallest seed of an idea was 'tossed into the room' like a grenade by Victoria, whence, from behind that curtain of foolishness, leapt JO with his 'vegetable garden' nonsense!

Whilst I am in complete agreement that the wonderful brain of Mr Squint could be of value after he has done with it, I see no reason whatsoever, why that of Mr Juggedone should not be removed immediately and investigated thoroughly.

J. Mengele
Spandau Ballet



On an unrelated, and somewhat troubling, matter, I feel I must remark upon the disturbing way this forum is bevoming a 'rather-too-chummy' place. The incessant back-slapping and congratulatory tone is starting to make me think we are, indeed, like a Round Table of knights overindulging in chivalrous antics that might be better, and assuredly, more discreetly, carried out in a small wood, in some bushes, or at least behind a bus stop at midnight.

Come on, chaps! We'll all be stood in a circle soon, holding each other's cocks!

Sir Quentin de Crisp
Exmouth

 
From News Discussion / Lap Dancing Replaces Line Dancing In West Midlands Town
Posted 23 Apr 17 00:48
Message
Here's one from the vaults. My mate lives in Stourbridge.

That's it. Move along!

 
From News Discussion / "Jesus And His Disciples Were Scottish", Claims Historian
Posted 22 Apr 17 10:29
Message
Lionel Messiah?

 
From General Discussion / Wrongly-heard Lyrics
Posted 22 Apr 17 10:26
Message
3. John Foxx

"Underpants"



 
210 Pages - [1] 2 3 4 5 » »»
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

Go to top

Who is online?

There are 3 registered users currently online: 2 are active , 1 is currently inactive .

Users online:

Profile Featured Writer

mikewadestr
mikewadestr
Joined: 16 September 2008
Stories Written: 212
84 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more