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From Magazine Discussion / Combat - June 9th 1944 - Northern France
Posted 14 Nov 11 13:55
Tried to 5 star this and it came up on the screen that I'd already rated it (which I hadn't). Went back to writer's desk and put the story on again. This time it accepted the 5 star rating. Anyone else finding they're being told they've already rated stories they haven't rated?

Terrific writing Skoob.

From Magazine Discussion / When Aunt Doris Came To Stay (Part Two)
Posted 10 Nov 11 12:52
FM: The challenge I set myself was to see just how bad a poem I'd be able to get through approvals! 'Bad' had to be 'good' in the context of the overall story.

EIF: Thank you for that comment.

Skoob: I can write longer poems, poems with more verses. Is that what you mean by 'must do better'? Yeah, it must be!

Thanks to all for the stars, and thanks to all who read my story. Cheers!

From Magazine Discussion / When Aunt Doris Came To Stay (Part One)
Posted 9 Nov 11 12:55
Cheers FM.


From Magazine Discussion / When Aunt Doris Came To Stay (Part Two)
Posted 9 Nov 11 12:53
Rhymes dunnit!

From General Discussion / Love You All
Posted 6 Nov 11 13:45
Don't forget to feed Skoobs cat.

From General Discussion / I couldn't sing a gay song, it wouldn't be sincere
Posted 5 Nov 11 17:47
Arm. The name of this site is 'The Spoof'. Calm down sir.

From General Discussion / I couldn't sing a gay song, it wouldn't be sincere
Posted 5 Nov 11 13:57
Laurel & Hardy dancing in 'Way Out West'. Marvelous!

From General Discussion / Should Arm change his name?
Posted 5 Nov 11 13:46
For quite a lot of us perhaps 'Legless' would be appropriate!

From General Discussion / My OU Forum are having arguments with each other
Posted 5 Nov 11 13:11
Savaloys scream after being in a micro wave oven for about 30 seconds. They taste nice though!

From General Discussion / Replacement Hearing aids batteries
Posted 3 Nov 11 15:30
Yep, that's the place Lynton. Wind? I was with me bruvver there one Saturday. Along some of the rows the market had permanent stalls concreted into the ground. Market had to be abandoned about 11am when the wind had buckled up most of the stalls! A stall behind us (not one of those permanently fixed to the ground) flew up in the air, bounced on top of our van, then flew on over our stall to come crashing down just in front of it. Luckily it didn't come down on anyone.
Wise to wear a crash helmet when visiting that market!

From General Discussion / Replacement Hearing aids batteries
Posted 3 Nov 11 01:02
Hemel Hempstead? Brother had a stall at Bovingdon for a few years. Gave it up after pissed down one Saturday, and returned home with about a thousand penlight batteries in a plastic carrier bag. The cards they'd been stuck onto had all fallen to bits after he'd left them out at the front of the stall trying to take in the pitch rent! Walked in and looking like a drowned rat just said "Don't ask" then went upstairs to his bed!

Hard life market trading - donations will not be refused.

(No Euros...No US dollars...sorry!)

From General Discussion / I hate that.
Posted 3 Nov 11 00:28
Me too.

From General Discussion / Halloween Vid
Posted 1 Nov 11 17:14
Very funny video Skoob. Do you remember Ray Alan? Not related to Lord Charles are you? Similar voice mate!

From General Discussion / Ha-Ha-Halloween
Posted 31 Oct 11 20:13
My front doorbell has a tendency to get stuck - it then
goes ding dong ding dong ding dong continuously - and loudly.

Some kids just pushed the bell hoping to 'get a treat'.
Bell got stuck. They ran off scared thinking they'd busted me bell. Ha-Ha ... I'm starting to love Halloween!!!!!!

From General Discussion / Replacement Hearing aids batteries
Posted 30 Oct 11 21:19
Keep a look out for the brand name Varta or Ray-O-Vac. Especially Varta - very good quality. Bit dearer than the
cards of batteries from the pound shops but very good quality.

From General Discussion / Replacement Hearing aids batteries
Posted 30 Oct 11 15:32
If a person's getting the hearing aid batteries for free - that's fine.

I used to have a market stall selling small electrical bits and pieces - including cell batteries. The wholesale price, even for the better brand names, is very cheap (very good mark up on them actually!) Hearing aids don't always use the same battery number, but it's often AG3, AG10, or AG13, or equivalent- AG13 is also called LR1ll4 for instance. Lots of people pay through the nose for these cell batteries, by following the 'use only our batteries' warnings. All I'm saying is that at the end of the day the money's coming out of your pockets! Nudge nudge! wink wink! Know what I mean?

PS: Best wishes Inch. At least you now have another chapter to add to those 'Tales of Woe'.

From General Discussion / Sex Change
Posted 26 Oct 11 14:20
Sex change? How much change will I get from a fiver?

From General Discussion / Misprinted book titles
Posted 25 Oct 11 22:22
The Working Revenue

A selection of made up funny nude reports originally published on The Poofs web site.

From General Discussion / Misprinted book titles
Posted 25 Oct 11 11:51
The Oily Bible
The Holy Bubble
The Holy Bobble

Hard Dimes
Hard Mimes
Hand Mimes

Animal Frame
Animal Arm ( or 'Army')

and, 'Coming Soon To A Cinema Near You' based on the book by Peter Benchley...,
(!) I could do with a music sign on my keyboard!


From General Discussion / That Gaddafi Chap
Posted 21 Oct 11 12:49
The burial I understand is to be at 'a secret place'. 'Secrecy'; 'behind closed doors'; 'hidden'; 'away from sight'; It seems that some people are consistent only by their attraction to darkness. Could it be that sunshine hurts their eyes?

Love & Light. TT.

From General Discussion / That Gaddafi Chap
Posted 21 Oct 11 12:15
Many years ago a complete stranger came up to me in the street to say hello, asked how I was, etc. He should have asked me who I was, not how I was! - He had 'got the wrong man'. As soon as I began to speak he realised something wasn't quite right because of my cockney accent - the person he'd thought me to be obviously didn't have a cockney accent. He apologised, but then stood there shaking his head saying I looked exactly like that other person. So it wasn't just that there'd been a resemblance from across the street. Standing face to face with me he was still saying I could have been that person standing there. Luckily I wasn't a hated dictator of a country being confronted by a lynch mob!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the person discovered in that Libyan drainpipe was other than Gadaffi. But what if he had been 'the wrong man', and/or what if that was the intention? It isn't unheard of for politicians/military figures to use decoys. Find perhaps a look-a-like patient found from a mental institute, or drug the decoy up for the 'occasion'. What might such a person then be heard to say to the lynch mob dragging them out from a drainpipe? Perhaps something along the lines of "What have I ever done to you?"

So yes, I feel a trial would have been preferable, and somewhat more civilised. Possibly there would have been some 'behind closed doors' deals and things that had taken place between Gadaffi and the US/Uk during recent years he would have mentioned during his trial. A lot of promises, smiles, and shaking of hands in his tent. Or he might have explained the reasons for why he hadn't decided to remove himself from Libya several months ago. Perhaps he thought better of it after hearing about Mubarak's timely stroke!

Love & Light. TT.

From General Discussion / Occupy Wall Street
Posted 14 Oct 11 13:18
Nowadays the wealthiest don't get richer by 'earning' it. What they do is they buy politicians. Taxpayers money is then stolen when contracts are awarded in return for donations to the party with promises of directorships later.
Small businesses have to follow rules the larger firms don't have to follow, and so on.

Capitalism isn't the problem. These scumbags are NOT capitalists. They are globalists, monopolists, and 'let's be absolutely clear about this' - they are fascists. Socialism has it's own Achilles heel. People then become part of a hive - with those same scumbags in control at the top of the hierarchy. What was Hitler's political party called? National Socialists!

The globalists are in a very strong position. Their Achilles heel is that they are outnumbered, but they'll simply laugh at the Wall Street protesters who say 'Down With Capitalism' or 'We Want Socialism'. They agree - they are NOT CAPITALISTS!

People had better wake up, and wake up fast. The God of the globalist fascist is Control. They feed their God with money they've stolen from YOU, the taxpayer. They've not 'earned' it - they've nicked it!

Starve their God as much as you can, at every opportunity. Don't buy their newspapers, don't eat their beefburgers, don't drink their fizzy pop.

Stop voting for politicians just because they have a pretty face, or a sexy voice. The devil doesn't have horns - he is well groomed, and wears a smart suit and tie. He smiles sweetly at you and pats your baby's head.

Oh, and stop scrambling your brains with those drugs! Those drugs put your discernment into a coma. We need that discernment. And we need it NOW!

There - that's got that off of my chest.

Have a nice day!

From General Discussion / Curses!
Posted 9 Oct 11 13:06
Colonel Goddamnfi

Count Dratcula (could omit the 'o' I suppose!)

Bashar al-Asshat

From General Discussion / The anniversary
Posted 8 Oct 11 11:43
There is a short film on the internet, 'Psychologists on coping with 9-11 truth' (You Tube). Irrespective of what happened on 9-11 the message from these psychologists does I feel provide each of us an opportunity to understand a little more about ourselves.

Love & Light - TT

From General Discussion / The anniversary
Posted 7 Oct 11 15:07
And what are we to make of 'building 7' ?

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