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From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 10:19
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Lower working class? Lower working class?

I'll have you know I'm a professional through and through.

Not just any Tom, Dick or Harris can do PR examinations and manual evacuations.

And you haven't seen the size of my hands.

Bastard!




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 10:10
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Lend you a tenner?

For what?

So you can put yer coins in the Sky Sports meter to watch England lose yet another fucking test series?




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 10:05
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Too fucking right...




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 10:01
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Ellis, going back to your original insult.

I'll have you know, I only took the name Bollocks when I walked away from my aristocratic upbringing and classical education.

Prior to that, I was known as Sidnius Scrotum.





 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 09:56
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Arm, just insults please. No niceties required.

I had an office in Storrington many years ago.

Absolute shit hole. They should have routed the new A24 through it.




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 09:52
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Arm, you live in West Sussex, don't you?

Move to East Sussex, mate. I hear Crawley is nice.

And ditch the bleeding kisses. This is an insult thread.




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 09:40
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Ladyboys? What are you insinuating?

Now, Ladygrumpyoldmen, that's different.

But then you don't need to go to Thailand for them.

I know of one who lives in the Stalybridge area.




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 09:33
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Too much Jack Daniels. I can't remember...




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 09:26
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Well, I never. I do believe there was the odd exotic asian, but never an avian.

That was below the belt.

I do hope Skoob doesn't see this thread.




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 09:15
Message



Ellis, please accept my apologies for being dopey and living here.

However, I would still contend the above. Also that I have had more engaging intercourse with a dead Norwegian Blue parrot.*


(*Attribution: Monty Python)




 
From General Discussion / Insult Thread
Posted 22 Aug 12 08:51
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Ellis, how dare you suggest my name is a load of bollocks.

You have the breath of a wombat and your mother was a possum!

So there!




 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 18 Aug 12 14:25
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Dear Spoof,

Unfortunately, on this occasion, the All Blacks knocked eight shades of shit out of the Wallabies.

Yours

Jonah Lomu




 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 18 Aug 12 10:57
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Dear Spoof,

There is nothing better than sitting infront of a log fire on a Saturday night, watching the All Blacks & Wallabies knock seven shades of shit out of each other. It's half time and the fridge beckons.

Sid




 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 15 Aug 12 12:58
Message



Dear Spoof,

How the fuck could I be pompous? I'm a naturalised Australian citizen, who turned his back on the estuarine culture of London and south east England.

Bring on the All Blacks, I say.

Toodle pip

Dame Evadny Ever-So-Average




 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 15 Aug 12 11:02
Message



In terms of what I write here, I'm an amateur.

Spoofing is a hobby and nothing more.

Sure, if I had the time, I would like to develop my satirical writing skills. The reality is that I don't have that time.

However, as is the case for any type of writer, our medium is the written word. The least we can do is use it correctly.

Just my thoughts. I have nothing further to add.




 
From General Discussion / Acronyms
Posted 14 Aug 12 11:48
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Are Catholics trying it on nowadays?

 
From General Discussion / Sink or Swim?
Posted 11 Aug 12 07:26
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I've just read that, after spending $310 million preparing their Olympic Team, each Aussie medal has cost them $10.5 million.

They would have been better off investing the money with Northern Rock.




 
From General Discussion / Disruption likely this weekend
Posted 28 Jul 12 12:54
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Disruption? I'm sick to death of it.

I waited 40 minutes for a bus today.




 
From General Discussion / And we're back
Posted 16 Jul 12 12:39
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Yes, we're back.

I've seen livelier mausoleums.




 
From General Discussion / Irony has finally died?
Posted 13 Jul 12 13:53
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Irony will never die. My missus has got a mountain of it to do.




 
From General Discussion / And we're back
Posted 13 Jul 12 11:58
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Absolutely priceless Ferg!




 
From General Discussion / Knitting With Mr & Mrs CJ
Posted 11 Jul 12 11:38
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That's where I'm going wrong.

I'm only able to 'drop one'.




 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 11 Jul 12 07:20
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Thank you Mark!




 
From General Discussion / Gardening With Mr & Mrs CJ
Posted 10 Jul 12 22:15
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Gardens need fertilliser.

If anybody is interested, I can locate an ample supply of horse shit.




 
From General Discussion / Knitting With Mr & Mrs CJ
Posted 10 Jul 12 22:13
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All this talk of knitting and darning is exhausting.

How about a thread for writers who like to watch dust settle?




 
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Andy Tattersall
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