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From Magazine Discussion / Fancy a Trip to Auschwitz? - "Let The Train Take The Strain"
Posted 22 Aug 12 12:52
Message
Indeed CM.

A shame that its writer, along with Lynton, is now banned.

And not even a chance to escape to a South American embassy...

* sigh *

 
From Magazine Discussion / Fancy a Trip to Auschwitz? - "Let The Train Take The Strain"
Posted 20 Aug 12 19:47
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Woof.

 
From General Discussion / I'm Trollicus...
Posted 20 Aug 12 13:31
Message
And so you never, ever, have to worry about the Grammar Nazis again...

Basic Grammar

Right. That's the forum sorted.

Unless there's anything else...?

=]

 
From General Discussion / I'm Trollicus...
Posted 20 Aug 12 13:14
Message
Flamin' Trolls?

I think this says it all brilliantly...

 
From Magazine Discussion / Fancy a Trip to Auschwitz? - "Let The Train Take The Strain"
Posted 20 Aug 12 07:08
Message
You make some very good points Fergus, but your timeline and historical / motivational depiction of Muffty, Tuffty and co are seriously flawed.

Cast your mind back, if you can be arsed, two years. It still should all be there on the forum records. The paeans to 'great writers', the tongues eagerly wagging on mega point-scoring ring-pieces. Gay Larry and all the crackers encouraging each other into deeper rabid hatred of all things they were afeared of.

In fact, they're still to be seen on another sad, tired world view site that is, apparently, 'one of the most interesting and funny sites on the web' - when it's not mired in computer-viralled anthrax, as it seems to have been the last few months. Ironic really, as it and its creators are as funny as anthrax, but not as charismatic.

I'm not here to reply for CJ, I'm sure she will do that, if she can be arsed.

I just wanted to set the record straight a little.

For what it's worth.

 
From General Discussion / Spoof FM. WARNING! May Contain Appalling Bad Taste And/Or Lulu.
Posted 20 Aug 12 06:51
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Oh.

 
From News Discussion / Tear Up the Record Books! Olympic Levels of Crap Spouted in a Few Short Days!
Posted 16 Aug 12 14:57
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Top bombing, Dr Jon.

 
From General Discussion / Dear Inchy
Posted 16 Aug 12 14:52
Message
* snork *

 
From Magazine Discussion / My Senior Moments: W/E: 21st July 2012
Posted 24 Jul 12 00:18
Message
Sorry, have come late to the fray and been catching up.

I echo wholeheartedly all of the above.

Gerry, keep doing what you - and so many of your readers enjoy - and keep writing!

Your stories, diaries and yes, your jokes!

You bring so much pleasure to people, that is a gift.

Carry on Inchy, you are the jewel of all that is real and decent on this site.

Ignore the twats... everyone else has.

Pin

(I nicked Churchmouse's laffing gear when he wasn't looking)

 
From General Discussion / ".....and I said 'Yes.' I said, 'It's my Dork.'
Posted 17 Jul 12 15:46
Message
Lordy! Don't go there Simon!!

That way lies madness, not to mention mega points.

Apparently there is a large back catalogue of "World's Largest..." stories spewed, er, penned by the veterans of this site; Vaginas, Penis, Anus(es), Mammary Glands, Scrotums, Gall Bladders(??!!), etc, etc... You name it, they've slathered over it.

So, like this poor chap - is it the Devil... or the Deep Blue Sea for ya?

Hmmmm...?

 
From News Discussion / Rogue bank loan starts panic in City
Posted 17 Jul 12 07:04
Message
Very neat idea. ****

 
From Magazine Discussion / 50 Shades of Grey or 10 Shades of S**t
Posted 17 Jul 12 07:00
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A cracker! More please.

*****

 
From News Discussion / Local Umpires Drop Royal Clanger At Village Cricket Match
Posted 17 Jul 12 06:52
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Leather on willow, muffins for tea, Shakespearean drolls and murder on the cricket pitch. What more could one want?

Waiting for the sequel, "The Umpire Strikes Back".

It's a ***** from oi. OO-arrrr...



Now for a shameless plug...

Quote: Simon Saunders
I don't recall seeing any other cricket stories in my time here.


Try this then Simon.

 
From General Discussion / And we're back
Posted 16 Jul 12 15:58
Message
Taking a leaf out of CJ's book and staying well away...

It's the thought of Mark 'venting' anywhere near me... our dog's bad enough after a bag of choc drops.

 
From General Discussion / And we're back
Posted 13 Jul 12 13:47
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That's a ***** from me too Fergus.

 
From General Discussion / Knitting With Mr & Mrs CJ
Posted 11 Jul 12 11:27
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Dear Mrs CJ,

My girlfriend is teaching me to knit.

So far, she's only taught me how to 'pearl', but not knit, 'cast off' or 'drop one'.

I've been practising and come out with a lovely pearl necklace.

Should I give her it?

Yours sincerely(ish),

Pin (cushion)

 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 11 Jul 12 09:54
Message
Dear Spoof,

Perhaps this is an opportune time to remind esteemed contributors to this thread that all correspondence should be addressed to 'Dear Spoof'...?

Failure to comply and wandering off-topic with inane chit-chat (see Forum Rules, see red) could result in instant deletion of messages and banishment to the stinking internet Hades of a sad, tired world in another place...

And you really don't want to go there now, do you?

Hmmmm?

You haff been warned!

pp CliveyDee (prop)
Limboland.



 
From Magazine Discussion / A True Diary of Woe - Part Fifty-Nine - Tesco 1962
Posted 11 Jul 12 09:31
Message
FFS Man! Do it!

At least we'll all go to Hell in a handcart laffing!

G'arn... you know you want to...



 
From News Discussion / Malware keeps web users from reading about malware problem that affects hardly any computers but managed to create fear and suspicion across internet
Posted 11 Jul 12 07:48
Message
Nice one HIGNFY! ****

I know of at least one US based "interesting and funny site"

* cough * * Trades Description Act* * splutter *

that seems to have been affected by critically discerning Russian malware.

Hope you've now been released by the FBI/CIA and are no longer wearing an orange jumpsuit on the sunny island of Cuba, taking in the rays and doing a spot of compulsory water-boarding?



 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 11 Jul 12 07:28
Message
Dear Spoof,

I would like to endorse the sentiments of the nicotine-addicted nipper above.

Yours, in contumely snuggliness,

Pix Nit
Potters Bar-Lowering,
UK



 
From General Discussion / Edinburgh Festival
Posted 11 Jul 12 07:06
Message

Quote: Simon Saunders
...I have no idea what a manager really does. If memory serves I think it involves wearing a sheepskin coat while furiously chewing gum and making wild gesticulations with your arms that nobody understands.



Ah, Big Ron Atkinson... whatever happened to her...?

* muse *

I see you as more of a Svengali-like manager, Simon.

A 60/40% split with your star man and a K2 tax-dodge savvy second to none.

Would love to go to the Festival, but it does get a mite frosty ooop North y'know.

So I'd settle for August in the Cayman Islands, along with the top impresarios (and moi), if I were you.



 
From General Discussion / Sadly, Ernest Borgnine passes away - aged 95
Posted 10 Jul 12 23:29
Message
PS KF... have you no sensitivity? Note the title of the thread. Hmmm? Please?

What tribute do you have to pay to Ernie Borgnine? Have you seen any of his films, perhaps?

If you're really curious and desperate to know the secret behind Inchy's 'big one' and how point-scoring can bring you happiness, why not PM him?

Jus' sayin'.





 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 10 Jul 12 23:18
Message
Dear Spoof,

Never mind,

You've still got "Acronyms"...

SRN Ratched,
Funnyfarm Villas,
Lunnun.


 
From General Discussion / Sadly, Ernest Borgnine passes away - aged 95
Posted 10 Jul 12 23:12
Message
RIP Dutch.

Pike, Deke, Freddie, Angel the Gorches awaits in you for a few fingers of red eye and some wonderful reminiscences of those days.

 
From General Discussion / Dear Spoof
Posted 10 Jul 12 23:04
Message
Some ****'s deleted it without a word of explanation, Skoob.

That's what.

(Redacted for public consumption)

 
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