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I thought it would be a laugh for my fellow spoofers to post *alternative* advent pictures on here to create the ultimate Crimbo calendar.







Arm xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Arm,

I saw some "alternative" advent calenders today while out shopping.

I found them in WHSmith's behind all the usual ones.

I say it's alternative, what I really mean is it's pornographic.

I managed to avoid the staff and open all the doors on one to have a closer look. Would you believe it, behind every door is a thumbnail snapshot of Mrs Claus in a variety of provocative poses. One including Rudolph and an oversize festive carrot. The chocolates are equally suggestive.

Disgusting really.

Needless to say I immediately purchased the lot and intend to distribute them to all my elderly relatives.

I won't put a link to the pictures as I'd probably get banned.

Simon

You slaughter me mate, your up there with Skoob, CLive Frankie and Roy. It makes my day.


Cheers mate.

Arm xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I've got an old IRA advent calendar. One of the doors is wired to an explosive.

I've got one from the local Jehovah's Witness group. Every time you open a door, a different recorded voice yells "fuck off!" at you.

Debbie

And you Debs, your wonderful, sorry I have not been in touch the house, kids, customers and the fuckin Great Dane have taken me to the edge. Thank god I have a misses that understands and tolerates me.




Love as always

Arm xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx