Discussion Forum

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Quote: IainB

Arse to Arse....I used to watch that.

It was rubbish.

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It's only my opinion, but I think we should draw the line at phonetic similarities, Debbie.

That is, if I am correct, and you are referring to the Robert Wagner/Stefanie Powers gubbins...


Someone may have already mentioned this song in the preceding posts - I can't really be bothered to check - but I had a distinct fondness for the brilliant 1979-released Blondie single Arse of Glass, which went to number one in several countries.

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Quote: Tommy Twinkle

Don't Go Breakin' My Arse - Elton John

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Ah that's better Tommy boy!

No hard feelings from me towards a fellow East End geezer. Arse of gold I've got mate.

BLAM!

Hey that's anuvver one!......

Arse Of Gold - Neil Young.

Lovely job

I was giggling away to some of these quotes with 'Heart' in them.

Heart Quotes

For example:

"Be still my ARSE; thou hast known worse than this."

This is a one off Mr Dee since you've been so kind as to add so many posts to my poor thread. You never did say what my forfeit was if I lose?

*Reins-in horse, tips stetson onto back of head and gently fondles six-shooter*

Alright there little lady. This here heart/arse thread is gittin a might wearysome hog-dammit. *spits onto floor*

Me an' the boys down at Gulch Valley were-a-talking, an' it seems like most of them-there heart songs are as exhausted as a rattlesnake in a musical arse/heart competition. So with this in mind Old six-pack Pete and his Injin guide suggested that we kinda change the 'heart' word for the word 'Love' which gets us a whole new level of arse songs. Yes siree Bob.

Not only that, but it gives us old-timers a chance to think up songs before them-there young whippersnappers 'n cow-pokes git the draw on us.


Alrighty there, let's start:

Arse on a mountain top
Arse me do
Arse grows where my Rosemary goes
All you need is Arse
Arse me tender
Arse is a many splendid thing



YE-HA! *Strikes match on horse's rump, lights Marlboro and gallops off into the sunset coughing*

Arse-ne Wenger has his head up his Arse-nal arse!

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Quote: Maria Rios

I was giggling away to some of these quotes with 'Heart' in them.

Heart Quotes

For example:

"Be still my ARSE; thou hast known worse than this."

This is a one off Mr Dee since you've been so kind as to add so many posts to my poor thread. You never did say what my forfeit was if I lose?

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Forfeit Dollface? To be fair I aint come up with one as yet but when I do it's gonna be real slow and real painful.

A bit like The Chinese Water Torture, listening to one of Skoob's jokes or getting old Wild Bill Churchmouse up there to fill in a truthful tax return.

Oh yes

By the bloody cringe! I pop over to dunkbikky for a bit and this is what happens!

HUZZAH MY ARSE!

Regards

Skoob.

oops....sorry Clive. I didn't read the heart part. Rather I did....but I teach kindergarten all day long and so my brain in mush when I log in at night!

Ellie..

Don't worry about it - my brain's in a mush all the time.

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: Ellie James

oops....sorry Clive. I didn't read the heart part. Rather I did....but I teach kindergarten all day long and so my brain in mush when I log in at night!

Ellie..

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Don't sweat it Ellie. Your arse is in the right place. At least your contribution may have staved off my own personal tutu hell and I thank you from the bottom of my arse.

Who would have thought there were so many arse-songs out there:

Groove is in the arse - Deelite, being medically accurate

Unchain my arse - Joe Cocker

My arse goes boom - some Eurovision crap

And my favourite:
Something's gotten hold of my arse - Gene Pitney

A woman's arse.

Mary Black and Eleanor McEvoy




The chorus:

My arse is low, My arse is so low As only a woman's arse can be.
As only a woman, as only a woman's, As only a woman's arse can know.

(There Must Be An Angel) Playing With My Arse - Eurythmics
Thunder In My Arse - Leo Sayer
Deep In The Arse Of Texas (Perry Como)

and by the multi-talented Liberace,

(All Of A Sudden) My Arse Sings.

For all of you who don't know, the arse of Texas is actually in Beaumont.

Ellie

Geeze, I leave for a few days and come back to a conversation about Ellie's arse. I must go away more often lol!

The correct spelling of that ejaculation (steady now!) JLF is "JEEZ!".

I know this because I'm told that the soppy bint in 50 Shades Of Grey" bawls it out in the throes of orgasm every time her two bob wanker of a posh boyfriend so much as lights a gasper ffs!

If I was him I'd go on the nicotine patches and tell her to get on with the f******g washing up.

Thanks for the contribution though mate as every one registered helps ward off the prospect of tutu terror pour moi

Gotta find a way to get into your arse - Big Funk Corporation.

Get back Ellis!!!...............GET BACK I SAY SIRRAH!

Christ!

Bleeding Arse - Jimi Hendrix.

Just seen it on the telly box.